The best communication jokes

Q: Why don't you ask Yoda for money? A: He is always a little to short.
Vote: has 75.00 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, communication, money
Son: "Dad, I'm cold..." Dad: "Stand in a corner, they're usually ninety degrees!"
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More jokes about: communication, dad, kids, science
Chuck Norris originally wrote the first dictionary. The definition of each word is as follows - A swift roundhouse kick to the face.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, communication
Every time I say that I'm ready to order in a restaurant, what I really mean is that I'm not ready but the panic will help me make a decision.
Vote: has 74.97 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, food, time
Q: How can you tell there's an afterlife for lawyers? A: Because after they die, they lie still.
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More jokes about: communication, death, lawyer, life
Boy: "Our principal is so stupid!" Girl: "Don't you know who I am?" Boy: "No?" Girl: "I'm the principals daughter". Boy: "Do you know who I am?" Girl: "No." Boy: "Good." *walks away quickly*
Vote: has 74.96 % from 72 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, management, school, stupid, vulgar
Yo mama's so fat when she stepped on a scale it said: "A.B.C.D.E.F.G get your fat ass off of me."
Vote: has 74.73 % from 52 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, fat, insulting, vulgar, Yo mama
Little Johnny's father farted. The son asked his father: "What was that?" His father said: "My sweet that is 'north wind'" When he went to school the teacher asked the class: "Who knows the direction of the north wind? Little Johnny shouted: "My daddy's ass!"
Vote: has 74.52 % from 2572 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, dad, fart, little Johnny, school
I love the lines the men use to get us into bed: "Please, I'll only put it in for a minute." What am I...? A microwave?
Vote: has 74.43 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, love, men, technology, time
A man was walking along a California beach and stumbled across an old lamp. He picked it up and rubbed it and out popped a genie. The genie said, "OK. You released me from the lamp, blah blah blah. This is the fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes so you can forget about three. You only get one wish!" The man sat and thought about it for a while and said, "I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?" The genie laughed and said, "That's impossible. Think of the logistics of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific? Think of how much concrete... how much steel!! No, think of another wish." The man said OK and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he said, "I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand women....know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they give me the silent treatment... know why they're crying, know what they really want when they say 'nothing'... know how to make them truly happy...." The genie asked, "Do you want that bridge two lanes or four?"
Vote: has 74.21 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, divorce, genie, travel


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