The best computer jokes

Chuck Norris can access the DB from the UI.
Vote: has 66.96 % from 35 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, geek, IT, technology
If the box says: "This software requires Windows XP or better" Does that mean it'LL run on Linux?
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More jokes about: computer, geek, IT, nerd, technology
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Vote: has 66.71 % from 15 votes. Send joke:
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Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.
Vote: has 66.46 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, game
A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets in, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank." The passenger asks "Who?"  The cabbie says "Frank Feldman. There's a guy who did everything right. Like my coming along when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to Frank every single time." Passenger: "Yeah. But there are always a few clouds over everybody."  Cabbie says "Not Frank. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone, danced like a Broadway star, and you should have heard him play the piano." The passenger replies "Sounds like he was something really special"  Cab driver responds "There's more... he had a mind like a computer. Could remember everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out." Passenger: "Wow, some incredible guy"  The cabbie goes "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams, not like me. I always seem to get stuck in them." "Passenger: "Mmm, there's not many like him around."  Cabbie: "And he knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. And he's never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too." Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"  Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank." Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?" Cabbie: "I married his fucking widow..."
Vote: has 65.80 % from 82 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: car, computer, golf, marriage, time
Chuck Norris doesn't use GUI, he prefers the command line.
Vote: has 65.80 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, coding, computer, geek, IT
Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.
Vote: has 65.48 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, game
Caller: Oh, no, it’s just the stupid, stupid design of this computer. Every time I want to click something, I have to unplug the keyboard to plug in the mouse. And then every time I want to use the keyboard again, I have to unplug the mouse. Because there’s only one jack. Agent: Ma’am, you do realize that there’s a jack on the keyboard itself? You’re supposed to plug the mouse into the keyboard, and the keyboard into the computer. Caller: Are you kidding me!? Oh, wait a minute—yes, I see it now! Oh, holy cow. That’s going to be so much easier! Agent: Just out of curiosity, how long have you been using your computer that way? Caller: Six weeks!
Vote: has 65.42 % from 61 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: computer, IT, stupid
Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1.
Vote: has 65.19 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: coding, computer, IT, nerd
Hide a seek champion... ; Since 1958
Vote: has 65.19 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: coding, computer, geek, IT, nerd