The best computer jokes

Q: What do you do when your computer gets wet? A: Put it in a bowl of rice, an Asian will show up and they will fix it.
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has 67.95 % from 397 votes. More jokes about: asian, computer, racist
If I wanted a warm fuzzy feeling, I'd antialias my graphics!
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, geek, IT, technology
Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, death, life, technology
Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1.
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has 66.96 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: coding, computer, IT, nerd
The biggest SEO problem with trampoline websites is the high user bounce rate!
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has 66.96 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: computer, geek, internet, IT, technology
Chuck Norris finished World of Warcraft.
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has 66.60 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, game
When you look for Chuck Norris on Wikipedia, it redirects you to the article titled "Roundhouse kick."
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has 66.45 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer
A man walks into the street and manages to get a taxi just going by. He gets in, and the cabbie says, "Perfect timing. You're just like Frank." The passenger asks "Who?"  The cabbie says "Frank Feldman. There's a guy who did everything right. Like my coming along when you needed a cab. It would have happened like that to Frank every single time." Passenger: "Yeah. But there are always a few clouds over everybody."  Cabbie says "Not Frank. He was a terrific athlete. He could have won the Grand-Slam at tennis. He could golf with the pros. He sang like an opera baritone, danced like a Broadway star, and you should have heard him play the piano." The passenger replies "Sounds like he was something really special"  Cab driver responds "There's more... he had a mind like a computer. Could remember everybody's birthday. He knew all about wine, which foods to order and which fork to eat with. He could fix anything. Not like me. I change a fuse, and the whole street blacks out." Passenger: "Wow, some incredible guy"  The cabbie goes "He always knew the quickest way to go in traffic and avoid traffic jams, not like me. I always seem to get stuck in them." "Passenger: "Mmm, there's not many like him around."  Cabbie: "And he knew how to treat a woman and make her feel good. And he's never answer her back even if she was in the wrong; and his clothing was always immaculate, shoes highly polished too." Passenger: "An amazing fellow. How did you meet him?"  Cabbie: "Well, I never actually met Frank." Passenger: "Then how do you know so much about him?" Cabbie: "I married his fucking widow..."
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has 66.18 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: car, computer, golf, marriage, time
Who said Windows 98 is a virus was wrong. Why? Because a virus does something.
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has 65.86 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: computer, IT
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blond female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mailbox. She opened it then slammed it shut and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out and again went to the mail box, opened it and slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, "Is something wrong?" she replied, "There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps saying, 'YOU'VE GOT MAIL.'"
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has 65.57 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: blonde, computer, men, stupid
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