UNIX is basically a simple operating system, but you have to be a genius to understand the simplicity.
Who said Windows 98 is a virus was wrong. Why? Because a virus does something.
Womens are like computer virus... they ENTER your life... SEARCH your pocket... SHIFT your balance ... CONTROL your life... when you become an old version DELET you from the system
Chuck Norris can send an e-mail with a pencil.
Caller: Oh, no, it’s just the stupid, stupid design of this computer. Every time I want to click something, I have to unplug the keyboard to plug in the mouse. And then every time I want to use the keyboard again, I have to unplug the mouse. Because there’s only one jack. Agent: Ma’am, you do realize that there’s a jack on the keyboard itself? You’re supposed to plug the mouse into the keyboard, and the keyboard into the computer. Caller: Are you kidding me!? Oh, wait a minute—yes, I see it now! Oh, holy cow. That’s going to be so much easier! Agent: Just out of curiosity, how long have you been using your computer that way? Caller: Six weeks!
There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
Three women were in a bar talking about their husbands and how they made love. The first woman said, “My husband is a psychologist, and before we make love, he brings me flowers and candy. I like that.” The second woman proclaimed, “My husband is a mechanic, he makes love a little rough, but really tunes my engine; I like that!” The third woman replied, “Well my husband works for Microsoft and all he does is sit on the edge of the bed and tell me how good it’s going to be, when I finally get it…”
Chuck Norris makes Power Point look weak.
Q: 0 is false and 1 is true, right? A: 1.
Q: What do computers and air conditions have in common? A: They're both become useless when you open windows.