The best cop jokes

Q: Why do cops arrest black people? A: Because monkeys belong in cages.
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has 21.05 % from 151 votes. More jokes about: animal, black people, cop, prison
Johny was stopped by the policeman on the road, the policeman has looked over the whole car and has said to Johny: "Johny, if you´ll go somebody by your car, the human would probably survive the collision with your car also without your help, but the treatment with the content of your archaic first aid box will survive nobody, there´s no doubt. Did you buy it in the shop B.C.?"
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has 20.60 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, little Johnny, time
"But my elderly aunt was considered a highly respectable spinster!" the society matron protested. "Can't you find some way to cover up the shocking fact that she died in bed while being simultaneously serviced by two paid studs???" "You just leave it to me, Mrs. Van Horn," soothed the police officer. "I'll just put it in my report that she died at the stroke of two."
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has 20.57 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: cop
How many cops does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one, but he is never around when you need him.
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has 19.98 % from 102 votes. More jokes about: cop, light bulb
There was a blonde a redhead and a brunette running from a cop. They hide in potato sacks. The officer kicks each bag....when he kicks the redheads bag she goes meow....when he kick the brunettes bag she goes ruff...when he kicks the blondes bag she goes potatoes!
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has 19.95 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, cop, ginger
Two clones are on a roof. One clone pushes the other clone off. The next day the police arrest him for making an obscene clone fall.
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has 19.69 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: black humor, cop
A man is driving happily along when he is pulled over by the police. The copper approaches him and politely asks, "Have you been drinking, sir?" "Why?" snorts the man. "Is there a fat bird in my car?"
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has 18.69 % from 118 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bird, cop, dirty, fat
Brings little Johny a can to policeman and asks: Can you please open the can? Policeman knocks at it: Please open the door, police...
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has 18.51 % from 431 votes. More jokes about: cop, little Johnny
Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, the other was eating fireworks. They charged one - and let the other one off.
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has 18.30 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: cop
The cops must be after you, because it's illegal to look that good.
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has 17.55 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: cop
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