The best death jokes

"I want a divorce"! "But you made a vow in the church that we remain together till death do us part." "I guess you are right. Very well, go ahead and drink up the tea I made for you."
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has 72.31 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: black humor, church, death, divorce, wedding
Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
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has 72.20 % from 219 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
I broke up with my Japanese girlfriend today. I had to drop the bomb two or three times before she finally got it.
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has 72.10 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, relationship, terrorist
Hitler wasn't such a bad guy. After all, he did kill Hitler.
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has 71.99 % from 158 votes. More jokes about: death, Hitler
When a Jedi dies they become part of the force, when the force dies it becomes part of Chuck Norris.
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has 71.63 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A man is at his lawyer's funeral and and is surprised by the turnout for this one man. He turns to the people around him. "Why are you all at this man's funeral?" A man turns towards him and says, "We're all clients." "And you ALL came to pay your respects? How touching." "No, we came to make sure he was dead."
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has 71.53 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: death, funeral, lawyer
Rabbit: "Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?" Doctor: "Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another."
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has 71.52 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, doctor, food
Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man. When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
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has 71.43 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Yo mama so old, I told her to act her own age and she died.
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has 71.29 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, death, old people, Yo mama
Death once got sentenced to Chuck Norris.
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has 71.25 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
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