The best death jokes

Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: cop, death, food, life
Q. What do Ethiopians and Yoko Ono have in common? A. They both live off dead Beatles.
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, music
Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? Noah - he was floating his stock while everyone was in liquidation.
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: bible, death, money
An 87-year-old man chats with his doctor: "So, I'm getting married again next week, doc!" "Oh, that's wonderful! And how old is the bride?" "She's 19." "That's fantastic – but I have to warn you, too much action in the bed can be deadly!" "Ah well, if she dies, I'll just have to remarry."
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, death, doctor, marriage, old people
Travel agency named „Bermuda triangle" – Let us meet on the other side.
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More jokes about: death, travel
My Chinese friend got really sick one day and had to go to a hospital. I went to see him the next day, but he just kept whispering "Chun Yu Yan" over and over – and then died. I was very sad and googled his last message after the burial. Apparently, it means "You're standing on my oxygen tube."
Vote: has 69.61 % from 214 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: asian, black humor, death, hospital
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
Vote: has 69.55 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, geography, health
Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
Vote: has 69.55 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
Vote: has 69.39 % from 58 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, phone
Behind every successful man, there is a woman. Behind every dead man, there is Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 69.34 % from 54 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, life, men, women


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