The best death jokes

Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
has 69.96 % from 12 votes. More jokes about: cop, death, food, life
When Chuck Norris throws a throwing knife, the knife doesn't kill his victim, the force of the air did.
has 69.86 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
An 87-year-old man chats with his doctor: "So, I'm getting married again next week, doc!" "Oh, that's wonderful! And how old is the bride?" "She's 19." "That's fantastic – but I have to warn you, too much action in the bed can be deadly!" "Ah well, if she dies, I'll just have to remarry."
has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: communication, death, doctor, marriage, old people
Travel agency named „Bermuda triangle" – Let us meet on the other side.
has 69.86 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: death, travel
Yo mama so old, I told her to act her own age and she died.
has 69.85 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: age, communication, death, old people, Yo mama
My Chinese friend got really sick one day and had to go to a hospital. I went to see him the next day, but he just kept whispering "Chun Yu Yan" over and over – and then died. I was very sad and googled his last message after the burial. Apparently, it means "You're standing on my oxygen tube."
has 69.80 % from 219 votes. More jokes about: asian, black humor, death, hospital
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, geography, health
Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
has 69.55 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A Liberal died and a friend went around collecting for a fund for his funeral. A woman was asked to donate ten dollars. "Ten dollars?" she said. "It only takes ten dollars to bury a Liberal? Here's a hundred - go bury 10 of them!"
has 69.49 % from 66 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, democrat, funeral, money
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
has 69.39 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
More jokes →
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