The best death jokes

Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra .... After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra Eventually died
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has 67.89 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
If you write the Death Note on Chuck Norris, the Death Note dies.
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris' beard can etch a sketch a picture of chuck killing a man. When the last line is drawn, that man dies!
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has 67.88 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Yo mama's so stupid she tried comiting suicide by jumping of a tall building but got lost on the way down.
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: death, stupid, Yo mama
There were these two bums and they were hungry when they came across road kill. The first bum went down to eat it when he looked up at his friend and said, "Oh I'm sorry, would you like some?" He replied, "No I think I'll wait." So they continue down the road and the first bum said, "Look - some more road kill, I'm still hungry. How about you?" His friend replied, "No, not yet, I think I'll wait." The first bum ate the road kill. Shortly after, his eyes rolled back and he puked the whole thing back up on the street. Seconds later, his friend dove in and ate every last slickery drop of the puke. The first bum said, "I thought you weren't hungry?" His friend replied, "I was always hungry, I just wanted a warm meal."
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has 67.68 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, food
The truth hurts dosen't it, Chuck Norris' truth kills.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris's keyboard doesn't have a Ctrl key because nothing controls Chuck Norris.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer, death, life, technology
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, work
Three guys die and go to Hell. Satan asks the first guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" "He was a candle maker." So, Satan burns off the guy's d**k. Satan asks the second guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" "He was a rope maker." So, Satan rips off the guy's d**k with a rope. Satan asks the third guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" The guy smiles and says, "He made lollipops."
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has 67.31 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: death, dirty
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