The best death jokes

A tight rope Walker is walking a tight rope between two buildings on the 85th floor in new York. At the same time in South Texas is getting a blow job from a 85 year old lady. What are both men thinking? Don't look down.
Vote: has 65.48 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, death, dirty, geography, sex
The Karate Kid killed caught a fly with two chopsticks, Chuck Norris killed a rhino with one.
Vote: has 65.32 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death, sport
Three guys die and go to Hell. Satan asks the first guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" "He was a candle maker." So, Satan burns off the guy's d**k. Satan asks the second guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" "He was a rope maker." So, Satan rips off the guy's d**k with a rope. Satan asks the third guy, "What was your daddy when you were alive?" The guy smiles and says, "He made lollipops."
Vote: has 65.20 % from 47 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, dirty
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
Vote: has 65.16 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, math
Chuck Norris invented the spoon because it's too easy to kill someone with a knife or fork.
Vote: has 65.16 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
The last thing that you see before you die, is Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 65.02 % from 5 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
What do you call a barn full of dead niggers? Out dated farm equipment.
Vote: has 64.93 % from 50 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, death, racist
I feel like every nature documentary is directed by a psychopath. "Here's the cutest baby animal ever." "Now let's watch something eat it."
Vote: has 64.90 % from 83 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dead baby, death
Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris can literally kill time.
Vote: has 64.78 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, time