The best death jokes

Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
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More jokes about: cop, death, food, life
In the war, a German ship suspected that they were being tracked by an Irish submarine. Unfortunately, they had used up all of their depth-charges. As an alternative, one of their Divers decided to swim down to the submarine and knock on the door.
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More jokes about: black humor, death, ethnic, military, war
Chuck Norris invented the spoon because it's too easy to kill someone with a knife or fork.
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Who was the greatest financier in the Bible? Noah - he was floating his stock while everyone was in liquidation.
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More jokes about: bible, death, money
An 87-year-old man chats with his doctor: "So, I'm getting married again next week, doc!" "Oh, that's wonderful! And how old is the bride?" "She's 19." "That's fantastic – but I have to warn you, too much action in the bed can be deadly!" "Ah well, if she dies, I'll just have to remarry."
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: communication, death, doctor, marriage, old people
Yo mamma so stupid she locked herself in safeway and starved to death.
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More jokes about: death, food, stupid, Yo mama
Travel agency named „Bermuda triangle" – Let us meet on the other side.
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More jokes about: death, travel
Patient: "Doctor, I want to thank you for your great medicine." The doctor was very much pleased. He asked: "Did it really help you?" Patient: "It helped me wonderfully." Doctor: "How many bottled did you find it necessary to take?" Patient: "I did not take any of it. My uncle took one bottle and I am his sole heir."
Vote: has 69.55 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, doctor, money
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, geography, health
Chuck Norris doesn't look both ways before he crosses the street... he just roundhouses any cars that get too close.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death


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