1 woman and 9 men shipwreck on a deserted island. After one week, the woman, disgusted by the things she was doing, kills herself. After another week, the men, disgusted by the things they were doing, buried her. After another week, the men, more disgusted by the things they were doing, dug her up.
An alcoholic, a smoker and a gay went to a doctor. The doctor told them that if they do again what they think are addicted to, they will die. As soon as the alcoholic went out of the hospital, he saw a bar. He thought for a while and said to himself, "If I drink one, I will die, if I don’t drink, I will die, too. So it’s better to get drunk." And he entered the bar, drank and died. At that time, the smoker saw one cigarette-end on the street. The gay walking behind him started crying, "Don’t! Don’t do it!" "Why? I want to smoke so much." "If you bend... we both are dead!"
If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
The phrase "I am become death, destroyer of worlds" was actually first coined by Chuck Norris when he came out of the womb.
You mamas so small she fell of her chair and committed suicide.
Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
There is a way to kill Chuck Norris, it is... Sorry, the person typing this just had his head bashed in by a roundhouse kick.
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
Chuck Norris was a comedian, but everyone started to die of laughter.
Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.