The best death jokes

1 woman and 9 men shipwreck on a deserted island. After one week, the woman, disgusted by the things she was doing, kills herself. After another week, the men, disgusted by the things they were doing, buried her. After another week, the men, more disgusted by the things they were doing, dug her up.
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has 62.44 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, women
An alcoholic, a smoker and a gay went to a doctor. The doctor told them that if they do again what they think are addicted to, they will die. As soon as the alcoholic went out of the hospital, he saw a bar. He thought for a while and said to himself, "If I drink one, I will die, if I don’t drink, I will die, too. So it’s better to get drunk." And he entered the bar, drank and died. At that time, the smoker saw one cigarette-end on the street. The gay walking behind him started crying, "Don’t! Don’t do it!" "Why? I want to smoke so much." "If you bend... we both are dead!"
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has 62.40 % from 314 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, death, doctor, gay
If you want to commit suicide, all you need to do is say,"Chuck Norris is a loser."
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
The phrase "I am become death, destroyer of worlds" was actually first coined by Chuck Norris when he came out of the womb.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
You mamas so small she fell of her chair and committed suicide.
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has 62.22 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: death, insulting, Yo mama
Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
There is a way to kill Chuck Norris, it is... Sorry, the person typing this just had his head bashed in by a roundhouse kick.
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Ghosts are actually caused by Chuck Norris killing people faster than Death can process them.
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has 62.14 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, work
Chuck Norris was a comedian, but everyone started to die of laughter.
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has 62.10 % from 49 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris knows how to kill you in more ways than you know how to die.
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has 62.06 % from 103 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
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