The best death jokes

About 4,000 years ago: God: "I shall create a great plague and every living thing on Earth will die!" Fish: *Winks at God and slips him a $20 note* God: "Correction, I shall create a great flood!"
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has 61.89 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: death, god, life, money, time
Q: What was the one thing Hitler did well? A: Kill himself.
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has 61.87 % from 117 votes. More jokes about: death, Hitler, morbid
Jenna, Jessica and ariana die. They all go to heaven and GOD says, "You can do whatever you want, just don't step on a pink cloud". The first day, Jenna goes out and comes back with a ugly guy. Jessica and Ariana ask, "what happen?". Jenna says, "I stepped on a pink cloud". The next day, Jessica goes out, she comes back with a ugly guy. Jenna and Ariana ask, "what happen?". Jessica says, "I stepped on a pink cloud". The following day Araina goes out and comes back with a HOTT guy, blue eyes, thin and tall. Jenna and jessica ask, "What happen?" The guy says, "I stepped on a pink cloud".
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has 61.71 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: death, god, heaven, life, ugly
Chuck Norris invented the question mark... so he could say the sentence "Do you want to die slowly of fast?"
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Someone call CSI. I just killed my workout.
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has 61.63 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: cop, death, fitness
How many animals can you get into a pair of tights? 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 beaver, 1 ass, 1 p*ssy, thousands of hares and a dead fish no one can ever find.
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has 61.59 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, fish
Chuck Norris had to stop washing his clothes in the ocean. The tsunamis were killing people.
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has 61.50 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Q: What do pregnant teenagers and their unborn babies have in common? A: Both their moms are going to kill them!
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has 61.45 % from 75 votes. More jokes about: baby, black humor, death, morbid, teen
Chuck Norris commited suicide, and lived.
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has 61.43 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Q: What' is Hillary Clinton favorite movies? A: Kill BILL 1 and 2.
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has 61.43 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, marriage, political, sex
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