The best death jokes

2PAC once thought he was tougher than Chuck Norris... he was later murdered.
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, music
"Killed it" is a figure of speech implying someone stopped the banter. To Chuck Norris that's just the motto of his life.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, life
Q: Did you hear about the Hungarian who thought his wife was trying to kill him? A: On her dressing table he found a bottle of "Hungarian Remover".
Vote: has 59.19 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, ethnic, wife
Babe when I die I want you to cremate me, pour my ashes into a bowl of chili, and eat me just so I can tear that ass up one more time!
Vote: has 59.17 % from 76 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, dirty
Death has a shadow... Chuck Norris
Vote: has 58.98 % from 8 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Question: How can you tell if your wife is dead? Answer: The sex will be the same but the dishes will pile up.
Vote: has 58.87 % from 39 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, sex, wife, women
A 92-year old woman had a full cardiac arrest at home and was rushed to the hospital. After about thirty minutes of unsuccessful resuscitation attempts the old lady was pronounced dead. The doctor went to tell the lady's 78-year old daughter (who wasn't blonde any longer, but just had to be at one time) that her mother didn't make it. "Didn't make it? Where could they be? She left in the ambulance forty-five minutes ago!" the former blonde asked.
Vote: has 58.75 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, blonde, death, health, hospital
Q: Why did the mathbook kill himself? A: Because nobody understood him.
Vote: has 58.65 % from 64 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, math
Did you hear about the cannibal who commited suicide? He got himself into a real stew.
Vote: has 58.56 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, death
What happens to black people after they die? Nigger Mortis.
Vote: has 58.52 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, death, racist