The best death jokes

Q: What kind of celebration pays down the national debt? A: A tea party.
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, money, political
A guy asks his waiter at a restaurant how they prepare their chicken. The waiter goes blank for a second, then says, "Nothing special really... We just tell them they're going to die..."
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, black humor, death, food, time
I feel like every nature documentary is directed by a psychopath. "Here's the cutest baby animal ever." "Now let's watch something eat it."
Vote: has 63.56 % from 150 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, dead baby, death
Q: If you are stranded on a desert island with Adolph Hitler, Atilla the Hun, and a lawyer, and you have a gun with only two bullets, what do you do? A: Shoot the lawyer twice.
Vote: has 63.43 % from 101 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, desert island, Hitler, lawyer
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Vote: has 63.26 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Why do women make better soldiers? Because they can bleed for a week and not die.
Vote: has 63.26 % from 41 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, men, military, women
1 woman and 9 men shipwreck on a deserted island. After one week, the woman, disgusted by the things she was doing, kills herself. After another week, the men, disgusted by the things they were doing, buried her. After another week, the men, more disgusted by the things they were doing, dug her up.
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, disgusting, women
Chuck Norris killed the devil and is selling his own line of Picks of Destiny, available in all Chuck Norris approved guitar shops.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, music
Chuck actually died four years ago, but the Grim Reaper can't get up the courage to tell him.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris once strangled a man with the mans own eyelash.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death


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