The best death jokes

Every 5 seconds, somewhere in the world, someone dies of Chuck Norris.
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, time
Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears. He says, "So what's bothering you, dear?" She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night." The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible! Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?" She says, "That he did, Father..." The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?" She says, "He said, "Please, Mary, put down that damn gun..."
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: church, death, husband, marriage
Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
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has 49.74 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, geography, health
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, lawyer
Did you hear about the skunk who sat on a fan? He got cut off without a scent.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, death
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
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has 49.41 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Yo mama's so overweight she kills thousands just by sitting down.
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has 49.30 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: death, fat, Yo mama
Chuck Norris is so powerful that when he goes fishing, the fish are so scared they drown.
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has 49.12 % from 53 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, fish
What did the Alabama sherriff call the nigger who had been shot 15 times? Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.
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has 48.90 % from 236 votes. More jokes about: black people, death
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