The best death jokes

Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Roses are red tulips are black. You'd look great with a knife in your back.
Vote: has 56.61 % from 84 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, morbid, poems
Q: How does an English man know that his wife has died? A: Sex is still the same but the dishes are stacked in the sink.
Vote: has 56.42 % from 63 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, sex, wife
What’s the difference between a dead skunk in the road and a dead black person in the road? There’s skid marks in front of the skunk.
Vote: has 56.38 % from 208 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, black people, death
Q: What' is Hillary Clinton favorite movies? A: Kill BILL 1 and 2.
Vote: has 56.36 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: celebrity, death, marriage, political, sex
Q: Why does Dr. Pepper come in bottles? A: Because his wife died.
Vote: has 56.30 % from 55 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, wife
What happens to black people after they die? Nigger Mortis.
Vote: has 56.20 % from 39 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black people, death, racist
On a long walk in the woods, Johhny found himself out late and decided to look for a place to rest the night. He finally found a hut in the middle of the woods and knocked on the door. An old man answered, and he agreed to give Johhny a bed for the night on one condition: the man's teenaged daughter would be in the other bed, and Johnny was not to touch her or disturb her sleep in any way. Johnny agreed, but changed his mind when he saw how beautiful the sleeping girl was and, while she didn't respond to his caresses, she didn't push him away either. The next morning, Johnny awoke alone, but he figured the girl had gone to do her chores and he eagerly awaited her return. Instead the old man walked in, wiping the tears from his eyes. "What's wrong?" asked Johnny. "Oh, I've just come back from the cemetery we had my little girl's funeral this morning. But thank you so much for sitting up with her body last night."
Vote: has 56.06 % from 113 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: death, funeral, little Johnny
A man cheats on his girlfriend named Lorraine with a girl named Clearly. Suddenly, Lorraine died. At the funeral, the man stands up and sings, "I can see Clearly now, Lorraine is gone."
Vote: has 56.06 % from 103 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black humor, death, funeral, music
What's the difference between a dead dog in the road and a dead nigger in the road? The dead dog has skid marks in front of it.
Vote: has 55.93 % from 75 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black people, death, dog


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