The best death jokes

Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death, food, life
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris hit you tomorrow, is going to hit you yesterday, and you're now dead.
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, time
The list of names at the end of every Chuck Norris film is the list of people he's killed.
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A rattle snake bit Chuck Norris in the leg and the snake died instantly!
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
The older I get, the earlier it gets late.
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: age, death, life, time
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, lawyer
A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. What's the problem?" "My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000." "Gee, that's tough," he replied. "Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leaving me $90,000." "Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you're depressed." "And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000." "Three close family members lost in three months? How sad." "Then this month," continued, the friend, "absolutely nothing!"
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, death, money
Chuck Norris did 5 successful suicide bomb missions
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction. He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore.
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, death, health, life
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