Chuck Norris gets younger by the kill.
I pray for: Wisdom, To understand a man. Love, To forgive him and; Patience, For his moods. Because if I pray for Strength I'll just beat him to death.
Why do men die before their wives? They want to.
The original CBS Survivor series was filmed in Chuck's mansion. No episode aired, as no one survived.
Every night while Dave is having dinner his wife Natalie goes to the bedroom turns off the light and makes out with Daves friend Andy by the window. After some days Dave had doubt and leaving supper he went to the dark room only to hear whispers from the other side of the window. He pushes Natalie away goes near the window,unties his pant and put his arse facing the window. After a minute Andy puts a kiss on his butt cheek and says "Natalie, haven't u brushed ur teeth today?"
Q: What animal rotates at least 200 times after it dies? A: A rotisserie chicken.
Little Johnny was a chemist. Little Johnny is no more. What he thought was H2O was H2SO4.
When Chuck Norris talks, everybody listens. And dies.
It is better to give than to receive. This is especially true of a Chuck Norris roundhouse kick.
Chuck Norris knows who's buried in Grant's Tomb.