The best death jokes

Doctor: "You have cataract in your eyes. But you need not worry It is hereditary." Patient: "Death is also hereditary. Does it mean we should not worry about it?"
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More jokes about: black humor, death, doctor
Boy’s father come back from uk & was calling his wife. Boy:- papa mom has died. father slaped boy & said why u dont inform me when i was in America Boy :- i thought i will give u a surprise.
Vote: has 36.23 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, kids, wife
A drill sergeant had just chewed out one of his cadets, and as he was walking away, he turned to the cadet and said, "I guess when I die you'll come and dance on my grave." The cadet replied, "Not me, Sarge...no sir! I promised myself that when I got out of the Army I'd never stand in another line!"
Vote: has 35.78 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, military
A recent widow was crying to a grief counselor. “We were married twenty-five years before he died,” she said, dabbing away a tear. “Never had an argument in all those years.” “Amazing,” said the councilor. “How did you do it?” “I outweighed him by forty pounds and he was a coward.”
Vote: has 35.66 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: death, marriage, old people
Q: Did you hear about the blonde couple that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater? A: They went to see "Closed for the Winter".
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More jokes about: blonde, car, couple, death, winter
When Chuck Norris pokes you on Facebook, you die.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, Facebook
Chuck Norris put humpty dumpty back together again, only to roundhouse kick him in the face. Later Chuck dined on scrambled eggs with all the king's horses and all the king's men. The king himself could not attend for unspecified reasons. Coincidentally, the autopsoy revealed the cause of death to be a roundhouse kick to the face. There is only one King.
Vote: has 35.32 % from 35 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Vote: has 35.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, death
Yo mama so fat she died.
Vote: has 35.28 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, death, fat, insulting
One fine day in the middle of the night, two dead boys got up to fight. Back to back they faced each other, drew their swords and shot each other. The deaf policeman heard the noise, and came and shot those two dead boys. If you don't believe this joke is true, ask the blind man, he saw it too.
Vote: has 35.01 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, cop, death