The best death jokes

Q: What's blue and doesn't fit? A: A dead epileptic.
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has 48.02 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death
The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
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has 48.00 % from 258 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, Hitler, jewish
A man in a bar sees a friend at a table, drinking by himself. Approaching the friend he comments, "You look terrible. What's the problem?" "My mother died in August," he said, "and left me $25,000." "Gee, that's tough," he replied. "Then in September," the friend continued, "My father died, leaving me $90,000." "Wow. Two parents gone in two months. No wonder you're depressed." "And last month my aunt died, and left me $15,000." "Three close family members lost in three months? How sad." "Then this month," continued, the friend, "absolutely nothing!"
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, death, money
Chuck Norris doesn't die...he just sleep in the ground for a little bit.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Did you here about the man that died from eating Rocky Mountain Oysters? The bull must have drug him a mile!
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: death, disgusting, drug
Why are lawyers buried 12 feet deep when they die instead of the normal six feet? Because deep down they are really good people.
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has 47.24 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: death, lawyer
Every 5 seconds, somewhere in the world, someone dies of Chuck Norris.
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, time
Chuck Norris gets younger by the kill.
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has 46.90 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: age, Chuck Norris, death
Why did Steve Jobs live his last moments in regret? They say your life flashes before your eyes just before you die. Unfortunately for Steve Jobs, his iPhone 4S didn't have a Flash player installed!
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, IT, life, phone
Three weeks after her wedding day, Joanna called the vicar who had married her. "Reverend," she wailed, "John and I have had a dreadful fight!" "Calm down, my child," said the Reverend, "it's not half as bad as you think it is. Every marriage has to have its first fight!" "I know, I know!" said Joanna, "but what on earth am I going to do with the body?"
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: death, marriage, wedding
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