Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
What did the Alabama sherriff call the nigger who had been shot 15 times? Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.
Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
Why are lawyers buried 12 feet deep when they die instead of the normal six feet? Because deep down they are really good people.
Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
Did you know the Dinosaurs crossed Chuck Norris? But only once.
Yo mama's so overweight she kills thousands just by sitting down.