The best death jokes

Getting your ass kicked by Chuck Norris? The only good news is you know when you will die.
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has 50.22 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris can kill with blank bullets.
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has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Mary Clancy goes up to Father O'Grady after his Sunday morning service, and she's in tears. He says, "So what's bothering you, dear?" She says, "Oh, Father, I've got terrible news. My husband passed away last night." The priest says, "Oh, Mary, that's terrible! Tell me, Mary, did he have any last requests?" She says, "That he did, Father..." The priest says, "What did he ask, Mary?" She says, "He said, "Please, Mary, put down that damn gun..."
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: church, death, husband, marriage
Batman is to Robin as Chuck Norris is to Death.
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has 49.86 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Q: How many Chuck Norris' does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: None. Chuck Norris can see in the dark.
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has 49.79 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, light bulb
Chuck Norris' yawn put people in comas.
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has 49.79 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
A study showed the leading causes of death in the United States are: 1. Heart disease 2. Chuck Norris 3. Cancer
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has 49.74 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, geography, health
Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road? A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, lawyer
Did you hear about the skunk who sat on a fan? He got cut off without a scent.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, death
Chuck Norris can kill you as many times as he wants to. He knows CPR.
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has 49.41 % from 60 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
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