The best death jokes

Chuck Norris cannot love, he can only not kill.
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has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death, love
Yo mama's so overweight she kills thousands just by sitting down.
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has 49.93 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: death, fat, Yo mama
George was taking care of a parrot for his aunt. This parrot was a very nasty parrot. It cussed and screamed and made fun of George, so he took the parrot and put it in the freezer. The parrot kept screaming and insulting George until finally it stopped. George thought to himself, “On no! I froze my aunt’s bird to death.” He opened the door and saw the bird alive! The bird said, “I’m sorry for my behaviour and will never act up again. George said, “Why the change?” The bird answered, “Because I saw what you did to the other bird."
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has 49.61 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, death, parrot
Chuck Norris doesn't see dead people. He makes people dead.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, death
Did you hear about the skunk who sat on a fan? He got cut off without a scent.
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has 49.51 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: animal, death
Good news, I've been given a goldfish for my birthday... The bad news is that I don't get the bowl until my next birthday!
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has 49.25 % from 42 votes. More jokes about: birthday, black humor, death, fish, time
Little Johnny was a chemist. Little Johnny is no more. What he thought was H2O was H2SO4.
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has 49.00 % from 79 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, death, little Johnny, stupid
I'm going to celebrate Halloween the same way I always do... by murdering a bunch of teens by the lake. Sincerely, Michael Myers
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has 49.00 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: black humor, death, Halloween, teen
What did the Alabama sherriff call the nigger who had been shot 15 times? Worst case of suicide he had ever seen.
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has 48.91 % from 234 votes. More jokes about: black people, death
The older I get, the earlier it gets late.
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has 48.79 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: age, death, life, time
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