The best dirty jokes

Two lepers playing poker, one threw his hand in, the other laughed his head off.
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has 52.77 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: dirty
Q: What do a gay and a garbage truck have in common? A: Both take it in the rear.
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has 52.50 % from 38 votes. More jokes about: car, dirty, gay
The matchmaker approached a single woman and told her he had a husband for her. “I’m ashamed to bring this up,” he said, “but the man wants to be sure you are compatible in bed. He wants, he says, a sample.” The woman was shocked. “Such a thing you ask a Christian virtuous woman? Such a crude person would suggest such a thing? He must be a barnyard animal, not a gentleman.” The matchmaker, trying to earn a fee, said, “He’s a pragmatic, man. After all, to him it’s not a big deal… just a sample.” She thought a minute. “A pragmatic man, is he? So tell him I don’t give samples. I can give him 50 or 60 references, if he wants, though.
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has 52.42 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, christian, dirty, husband, women
A teacher was asking his pupils to tell the name of body organs. When he asked the name of buttocks when pointing the picture of it, one of the pupils answered: "Its name is trouble". When the teacher asked the boy about the reason, the boy replied: "I myself saw my father last night rubbing my mother's ass saying 'what a trouble it is.'"
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has 52.41 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, kids, sex, teacher
A nun with big boobs boarded a bus and sat near a dude. The dude kept looking at the nun's boobs. The nun realized this. She held her rosary and asked, "Are you looking at Jesus on the cross?" The man said "No, I'm looking at the 2 thieves beside him."
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has 52.25 % from 71 votes. More jokes about: dirty, god
Q: What do you call a blonde at a golf course? A: The 19th hole.
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has 52.10 % from 52 votes. More jokes about: blonde, dirty, golf
If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
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has 52.05 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, flirt, sex
A kid came home from school and asked his dad, "Dad, I heard some kids talking about a thing called a vagina. What is a vagina, and what does it look like?" "Well, son, before sex it looks like a beautiful unopened rose." "Wow, what does it look like after sex?" "Well, son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonaise?"
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has 52.05 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: dad, dirty, sex
In an African city, there was a club that all its members had long dicks. On the other day, an European guy went to register his name in that club. When he knocked the doorkeeper asked the guy's penis length the guy said: "Mine is 10 inches long" The caretaker appeared at the door and begun laughing: "Here isn't a suitable place for you." The porter said, "Look at me I 've turned three time my dick around my waist so I'm only a caretaker and you by a baby dick."
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has 52.05 % from 59 votes. More jokes about: communication, dirty, geography, vulgar
Come on guys, I think we are a little tough on pedophiles, they have a hard time fitting in.
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has 51.88 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: black humor, dirty, kids, sex
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