Come on guys, I think we are a little tough on pedophiles, they have a hard time fitting in.
Vote:
Daughter: Dad, this guy told me the sweetest thing ever.
Me: What's that hunny?
Daughter: He said I had nice bumper lights, and a nice trunk.
Me: Tell that niggie if he fills up your gas tank, I'll break his exhaust pipe, ya dig?
Vote:
Chuck Norris grabs Donald Trump by the pussy.
Vote:
A nun with big boobs boarded a bus and sat near a dude.
The dude kept looking at the nun's boobs.
The nun realized this.
She held her rosary and asked, "Are you looking at Jesus on the cross?"
The man said "No, I'm looking at the 2 thieves beside him."
What do you call a sex-crazed gay cannibal?
A head hunter!
A kid came home from school and asked his dad, "Dad, I heard some kids talking about a thing called a vagina. What is a vagina, and what does it look like?"
"Well, son, before sex it looks like a beautiful unopened rose."
"Wow, what does it look like after sex?"
"Well, son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonaise?"
A man walks into his doctor's office and whines, "Doc, you've got to help me; I've got a strawberry stuck up my ass."
The doctor pulls out his prescription pad and says, "I've got cream for that!"
Q: Why are Christmas trees better than Men?
A: Even the small ones give satisfaction.
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung?
A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!