If we were both squirrels, would you let me bust a nut in your hole?
A kid came home from school and asked his dad, "Dad, I heard some kids talking about a thing called a vagina. What is a vagina, and what does it look like?" "Well, son, before sex it looks like a beautiful unopened rose." "Wow, what does it look like after sex?" "Well, son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonaise?"
Yo moma is so fat, and so nasty, when she sat down on the toilet, grown men fall out of her screaming "We're free! We're free!"
Want to make a porno? We don't have to tape it.
Lesbians can also take Viagra. They don't have to swallow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.
Q: How can you tell if a lawyer is well hung? A: You can't get a finger between the rope and his neck!
What do you call a sex-crazed gay cannibal? A head hunter!
A biker walks into a gay bar and sits down to have a drink when a guy walks up to him and asks "hey biker you ever played barroom football"? "What are you talking about" the biker replies. "You know you guzzle a beer down that's the touchdown then pull your pants down and bend over and if you can fart the kicks well." The gay guy goes first to demonstrate. The biker states "I can do that and even better." He chugs the beer, slams the bottle, stands up pulls his pants down bends over to fart the gay guy jumps behind him and shouts "blocked that kick".
Chuck Norris grabs Donald Trump by the pussy.
Yo mama ass so big your dad's dick gets lost in it.