The best dirty jokes

What's the difference between a mosquito and a woman? When you slap a mosquito it stops sucking.
Vote: has 50.54 % from 57 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, dirty, sex, women
Whats the difference between Paris Hilton and a bowling ball? You can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!
Vote: has 50.40 % from 50 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty
Knock Knock. Who's There? Justin. Justin who? Your justin time to wipe my ass!
Vote: has 50.34 % from 59 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, knock-knock, sex
We're like hot chocolate and marshmallows... You're hot and I wanna be on top of you.
Vote: has 50.29 % from 43 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: chocolate, dirty, flirt, food, sex
"Hey, I have a magic dildo for sale," he says. "What? There's no such thing," she replied. "No seriously, if you don't believe me try it out in the bathroom. All you have to say is 'magic dildo my pussy.'" A bit skeptical she agrees and takes the dildo to the bathroom. A few minutes later she comes out. "Wow, that was great!" She says. She ends up buying the dildo and leaves the store. On the drive home she starts to feel a little frisky and figures why not try out the magic dildo. Well she's really enjoying herself. The car is swerving and she rolls through a red. She ends up getting pulled over by a cop. After she rolls down her window she tells him the whole story. She explains about the magic dildo and the shop. The cop says, "Magic dildo my ass."
Vote: has 50.08 % from 118 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: cop, dirty, gay, sex
Girl, do you need to get your protein macros up? Because I'd gladly put my meat inside you.
Vote: has 49.79 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, fitness, flirt, food, sex
Q: What do you call a blonde with a dollar on her head? A: All you can eat under a buck.
Vote: has 49.36 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, money
Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
Vote: has 49.36 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: cop, dirty, sex, stupid, Yo mama
Are you a shark? Cause I've got some swimmers for you to swallow.
Vote: has 49.36 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, dirty, flirt, sex
What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.
Vote: has 49.30 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty


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