Girl: "Do you believe in puppy love?" Boy: "I tried it once, but their assholes are too small."
Baby, if you were an iPhone 6, I would tap you all day!
Girls are like biscuits - they are tough until they get wet.
Two lepers playing poker, one threw his hand in, the other laughed his head off.
The pregnancy report of Santu’s wife came. Doctor said, "Oh, nothing to get excited, it was just the gas problem." Santu looks up at the sky towards the God and says, "Lord, What have you given me, a penis or an Air Pump."
A biker walks into a gay bar and sits down to have a drink when a guy walks up to him and asks "hey biker you ever played barroom football"? "What are you talking about" the biker replies. "You know you guzzle a beer down that's the touchdown then pull your pants down and bend over and if you can fart the kicks well." The gay guy goes first to demonstrate. The biker states "I can do that and even better." He chugs the beer, slams the bottle, stands up pulls his pants down bends over to fart the gay guy jumps behind him and shouts "blocked that kick".
Lesbians can also take Viagra. They don't have to swallow it, they just let it melt in their tongues.
Insurance companies are trying to set new guidelines before approving Viagra coverage. What will they use to set those guidelines? A growth chart.
A woman asks an agriculturalist: "Please, tell me what shall I do? I have a garden but nothing grows there, like flowers or vegetables." The agriculturalist says: "You know, it is to dung the garden with a good fertilizer." The woman says: "And wouldn´t it be better to plant the vegetables directly into the ass?"
Whats the difference between Paris Hilton and a bowling ball? You can only get 3 fingers in a bowling ball!