The best dirty jokes

Little Johnny's teacher asks him, "If I have 5 cookies, and I give you 2, how many cookies do I have left?" Little Johnny replies, "Zero, you're giving me more than just 3 cookies. I'm taking all 5 baby!" The teacher just facepalms herself. "I can strongly suggest that you work on your math skills Johnny." the teacher suggests. "Oh I know math, one man plus one girl, subtract a condom, equals a baby!" Little Johnny says.
Vote: has 48.37 % from 30 votes. Send joke:
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WTF? = Where's The Food?
Vote: has 48.34 % from 80 votes. Send joke:
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A black third grader goes to his mom and asks, '"Mom, I have the biggest dick in the third grade. Is that because I'm black?" And she responds, "No nigga, it's because you're nineteen!"
Vote: has 48.20 % from 67 votes. Send joke:
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What is the same with spreading butter on a toast and getting a woman to spread her legs? It is possible with a credit card, but much easier with a knife.
Vote: has 48.11 % from 54 votes. Send joke:
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Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman? A: Too close to the gas chamber.
Vote: has 46.90 % from 61 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: black people, dirty, jewish, men, women
There once was a girl named Pinkie who desired to have a little inky, when the notion of the motion was planted, in her dinky little head. With her butt in the air, while the man in the sidecar tattooed her derriere 100 miles per hour down I 45 to bike fest. Drunk and stupid and would not listen, smeared beyond recognition, she said it was Tinker Bell but we couldn't tell O well.
Vote: has 46.70 % from 20 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, driving, drunk, poems, stupid
I hope the children will never find out why I say "oops..." so often when I vacuum their rooms.
Vote: has 46.60 % from 31 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, kids, masturbation
Sometimes I wish I was a bird: I would fly over certain people and shit on their heads.
Vote: has 46.59 % from 73 votes. Send joke:
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Your momma's like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow.
Vote: has 46.37 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, insulting, sex, Yo mama
Chuck Norris can't have children, because his dick wouldn't fit.
Vote: has 46.37 % from 33 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, dirty, kids, sex


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