The best doctor jokes

The psychiatrist asks his patient: "Do you really think that you are a horse?" The patient: "Yes." The Doctor: "Ok, it will be a long and expensive therapy." The patient: "It's ok, I have enough money." Doctor: "And how it is possible?" The patient: "Because I have won three times horse races."
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has 65.14 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: doctor, horse, money
A man working with an electric saw accidentally saws off all 10 fingers. He rushes to the emergency room. The doctor says, "Give me the fingers and I'll see what I can do." "But I don't have the fingers!" "Why didn't you bring the fingers?!" asks the incredulous doctor. "Doc, I couldn't pick them up."
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, work
Patient: "I am sorry to call you to my house so far away from your chamber at this time of night." Doctor: "Don’t worry. I have another patient near here. So I can Kill two birds with one stone."
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has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: death, doctor, life
"Doctor I feel like biscuits!" "What, you mean those square ones?" "Yes!" "The ones you put butter on?" "Yes!" "Well, that means you’re crackers!"
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has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
Q: What is the worst thing an emergency doctor can tell you after admitting your MIL? A: Sir, we were able to save her!
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has 64.51 % from 56 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, life, mother in law
First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?" Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
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has 64.34 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food
A Grandmother was checking out her grand-daughters grasp of colours and tested her regularly. She would ask her and the grand-daughter would always get the colour right. One day as we were heading to the doctors she turned to her Grandma and said "Don’t you think it’s time you tried to figure some of these out for yourself?"
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: doctor, old people
Yo' Mama is so poor, my jack-o-lantern gets better dental work then she does.
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has 63.75 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: doctor, work, Yo mama
Rabbit: "Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?" Doctor: "Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, doctor, food
Doctor: "And how is it going with your old ailment, Mr Smith?" Patient: "Very well, I've been divorced for half a year now."
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has 63.66 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: divorce, doctor, life, relationship
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