The best doctor jokes

A woman went to the doctor's and complained of being really sore. "Do you have any idea why?" "Well, I had sex with an elephant!" "You did? But elephants are known to have small penises!" "Yeah, but he fingered me first."
Vote:
has 55.57 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor, elephant, sex
A 90 year old women goes to the doctor. Dr i can't stop farting, sure they don't smell and make no noise but still i can't take it any more. Well take these pills every day and come back in a week. Dr what did you do to me not only am i still farting now they smell as well! Oh very well , now about your hearing...
Vote:
has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: age, doctor, drug, old people
Doctor: "What seems to be your trouble?" Patient: "When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour." Doctor: "Try getting up one hour later."
Vote:
has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, life
Man: When I bend my arm like this it hurts? Doctor: Well, stop doing it!
Vote:
has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
Patient: "Doctor, I can’t sleep." Doctor: "Lie at of edge of your bed and you will sleep off."
Vote:
has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
A man with a bad rash on his hands went to his doctor. The latter examined his hands carefully for sometime and consulted many large volumes on his shelves. Finally, he asked the patient: "Have you had this trouble before?" He answered: "Yes." Doctor said: "You have again got it."
Vote:
has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: doctor, life
Michael: "What treat do eye doctors give out on Halloween?" Matthew: "I don't know. What?" Michael: "Candy corneas."
Vote:
has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: black humor, disgusting, doctor, Halloween, morbid
Yo momma so stupid she thought that doctor pepper could heal her.
Vote:
has 54.49 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: doctor, food, health, stupid, Yo mama
A man went to the doctor complaining of insomnia. The doctor gave him a thorough examination, found absolutely nothing physically wrong with him, and then told him, "Listen, if you ever expect to cure your insomnia, you just have to stop taking your trouble to bed with you." "I know," said the man, "but I can’t. My wife refuses to sleep alone."
Vote:
has 54.49 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: doctor, health, marriage, wife
What do you call a herd of cows in a psychiatrists office? An encownter group.
Vote:
has 54.26 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor
<<<24252627
More jokes →
Page 24 of 33.