The best family jokes

Get bad marks, relatives will insult you. Get good marks, friends will insult you.

I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight. It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.

Q: What's worse than ants in your pants? A: Uncle.

A man and wife were making love. When thay saw there 8 year old son at the door crying the dad started laughing and the boy ran away. Mom said "You better fix this now." The dad couldn't find the boy anywhere unwell he hurd a loud noise conning from grandma's room so he opened up the door and there was the boy putting his "wood" to grandma. The dad screamed "What the fuck." The boy said "It aims so funny when it's your mom is it."

This little kid is walking up the street with his Daddy. They see two dogs going at it. The little kid says "Hey daddy what are those doggies doing?" The father says "Ahh, they're making a puppy." That night the little kid walks in on his mother & father and daddy's on top driving it home to mama! The little kid says "Hey daddy what were you doing with Mommy?" He says "Oh, were making it a baby." The kid say "Turn her over, I want a puppy!"

Black Jokes are not funny I have a black guy in my family way up in my family tree. He's been hanging there for quite a while.

Your mama is so ugly that I guess you can say that the genes passed down.

Dad: "Who do you think the committee screwed this year?" Me: "Mom."

What do your parents' car and testicles have in common? Hit either one of them and you're grounded.

A single car crash kills a Mexican family. 15 people died.