I'm going trick or treating with my mum tonight.
It's the only time I can take her out as she's been dead for ten years.
Q: Which Bible character had no parents?
A: Joshua, son of Nun (Joshua 1:1).
Q: Why is a sheep better than a woman?
A: A sheep doesn't care if you fuck her sister.
Q: What is the diffrence between a black guy and a pizza
A: A pizza can feed a family of four.
Vote:
Half dressed redneck couple sitting on a couch watching the news on TV with man's arm around the woman.
The man says "Lookit them homo-sekshuls a ruining the sanctity of our institution.
"We oughta go to San Francisco just to show them liberals that marriage means one man, one woman. "
"Right, Darlin."
The woman replies, "That's right, Daddy."
Vote:
A skunk family had two little skunks they called In and Out.
One day little In disappeared. Mother Skunk, Father Skunk and young Out spent hours looking for him, getting more worried all the time.
In the end the parents went home to have a cup of tea, but Out said he d continue searching for a while.
Half an hour later he returned home, with a tired In following behind him.
"However did you find him?" asked Father Skunk.
"In-stinct," replied Out.
Did you hear about the cannibal family who were caught spying by the witch-doctor?
They were given a right roasting.
Vote:
Teacher: "Who can tell what is a mammal?
Little Johnny: "My grand mother!"
Vote:
This little kid is walking up the street with his Daddy.
They see two dogs going at it.
The little kid says "Hey daddy what are those doggies doing?"
The father says "Ahh, they're making a puppy."
That night the little kid walks in on his mother & father and daddy's on top driving it home to mama!
The little kid says "Hey daddy what were you doing with Mommy?"
He says "Oh, were making it a baby."
The kid say "Turn her over, I want a puppy!"
What do your parents' car and testicles have in common?
Hit either one of them and you're grounded.