The best fart jokes

Q: Why do farts smell? A: So deaf people can enjoy them, too.
Vote: has 72.92 % from 75 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Yo mama is so fat whenever I want to make sex I would request her to fart in order to find the address of her ass.
Vote: has 71.52 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, fat, sex, Yo mama
Yo momma so poor that when she farted she said clap your hands stomp your feet praise to the lord we have heat.
Vote: has 71.47 % from 190 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, god, insulting, money, Yo mama
An Avon Lady was delivering products in a high-rise and was riding in the elevator. Suddenly, she had the powerful urge to fart. Since no one was in the elevator, she let it go - and it was a doozy. Of course, the elevator then stopped at the next floor, so she quickly used some Avon Pine-Scented Spray to cover up the smell. A man entered the elevator and immediately made a face. "Holy cow! What's that smell?" "I don't know, sir. I don't smell anything. What does it smell like to you?" "Like someone crapped a Christmas tree."
Vote: has 71.35 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, Christmas, fart, life
A man farts in bed next to his wife. His wife asks, "What in the world was that?" He replies, "Touchdown. I'm winning, seven nothing." She decides to get even, so she lets one loose. He yells at her, "What was that?" She replies, "Touchdown, tie score." He wants to get her back, but he tries so hard he sh*ts in bed. The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?" He replies, "Halftime, switch sides."
Vote: has 71.15 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, sport, wife
Yo mamas so fat when she farted she caused global warming!
Vote: has 71.15 % from 45 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, Yo mama
Husband: Shall we try a new positon tonight? Wife: Sure. You stand by the ironing board, and I'll sit on the couch while drinking beer and farting.
Vote: has 70.40 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beer, fart, husband, life, wife
The preschool teacher says, "We're going to do vocabulary today. Who can use the word 'definitely' in a sentence?" Mary raises her hand and exclaims, "Me me me!" The teacher says, "Go ahead, what's the sentence? Mary replies, "The sky is definitely blue." "That's good, Mary," says the teacher, "but the sky can also be gray or white." Sam raises his hand and states, "Grass is definitely green." The teacher says, "That's good, Sam, but grass can be brown, too." Little Johnny raises his hand and asks, "Do farts have lumps in them?" The teacher says, "No Johnny, why do you ask that?" Little Johnny replies, "Well, I definitely sh*t my pants."
Vote: has 68.96 % from 102 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, little Johnny, teacher
Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge? A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
Vote: has 68.45 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, food, gay
A family brings their elderly mother to a nursing home. The nurses bathe her and set her in a chair at a window. After a while, she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately straighten her up. Again, she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back to put her upright. This goes on all morning. Later, the family arrives and asks, "Are they treating you all right?" "It's pretty nice," the old woman replies. "Except they won't let you fart."
Vote: has 67.88 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, family, fart, nurse, old people