The best fart jokes

Yo mamas so fat when she farted she caused global warming!
Vote: has 69.34 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, Yo mama
A family brings their elderly mother to a nursing home. The nurses bathe her and set her in a chair at a window. After a while, she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately straighten her up. Again, she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back to put her upright. This goes on all morning. Later, the family arrives and asks, "Are they treating you all right?" "It's pretty nice," the old woman replies. "Except they won't let you fart."
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, family, fart, nurse, old people
A man farts in bed next to his wife. His wife asks, "What in the world was that?" He replies, "Touchdown. I'm winning, seven nothing." She decides to get even, so she lets one loose. He yells at her, "What was that?" She replies, "Touchdown, tie score." He wants to get her back, but he tries so hard he sh*ts in bed. The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?" He replies, "Halftime, switch sides."
Vote: has 68.73 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, sport, wife
Husband: Shall we try a new positon tonight? Wife: Sure. You stand by the ironing board, and I'll sit on the couch while drinking beer and farting.
Vote: has 67.68 % from 24 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: beer, fart, husband, life, wife
Yo' Mama is so nasty, her farts are classified as biological weapons.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, insulting, science, Yo mama
Being single is cool cause you can eat a whole jar of pepperoncinis and spend the rest of the night farting spicily into the abyss.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, food, single
Q. How do you know when you are getting old? A. When you start having dry dreams and wet farts.
Vote: has 66.22 % from 259 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, fart, sex
Bill Gates, Andy Grove, and Jerry Sanders (CEOs of MicroSoft, Intel, and AMD) were in a high-powered business meeting. During the serious, tense discussion, a beeping noise suddenly is emitted from where Bill is sitting. Bill says, “Oh, that’s my beeper. Gentlemen, excuse me, I need to take this call.” So Bill lifts his wristwatch to his ear and begins talking into the end of his tie. After completing this call, he notices the others are staring at him. Bill explains, “Oh, this is my new emergency communication system. I have an earpiece built into my watch and a microphone sewn into the end of my tie. That way I can take a call anywhere.” The others nod and the meeting continues. Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Andy starts beeping. He states, “Excuse me gentlemen, this must be an important call.” So Andy taps his earlobe and begins talking into thin air. When he completes his call, he notices the others staring at him and explains, “I also have an emergency communication system. But my earpiece is actually implanted in my earlobe, and the microphone is actually embedded in this fake tooth.” The others nod, and the meeting continues. Five minutes later, the discussion is again interrupted when Jerry emits a thunderous fart. He looks up at the others staring at him and says, “Somebody get me a piece of paper… I’m receiving a FAX."
Vote: has 65.56 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, celebrity, fart, IT, phone
Yo' Mama is so fat, when she farts, it comes out at the ankles of her tight-ass jeans.
Vote: has 65.48 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, fat, insulting, Yo mama
Yo' Mama is so nasty, when her dog farts, she takes the credit.
Vote: has 64.88 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dog, fart, insulting, Yo mama