The best fart jokes

Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"
Vote: has 58.38 % from 69 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, kids, little Johnny, school, teacher
Yo' Mama is so poor, when she farts, her holey underwear whistles.
Vote: has 57.36 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fart, insulting, money, Yo mama
How do you know when a blonde has a brain fart? Her ears flap.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

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Yo mama so fat the highway patrol made her wear "Caution! Wide Turn"
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: car, fart, travel, Yo mama
Two gay men are walking down the street trying to bum a ride. A truck driver picks them up. After a while the first gay man asked in a very gay voice, "Please sir can I fart?" The truck driver then says, "Yeah sure who cares." So the gay guy goes "POOF". Then the second gay man asks if he can fart. The truck driver says he doesn't care and the second gay man went ''poof''. Then the big truck driver goes to the gay men and says, "Ok gentlemen can I fart?" The gay men say right on and the truckdriver lets it blow. The fart was huge and smelly and loud. The gay men then say, "He is obviously a virgin."
Vote: has 55.51 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, gay
What's gross? Farting in the bathtub. What's grosser than that? Catching the bubbles with your teeth.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart
How many skunks do you need to make a house really smelly? Just a phew.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, fart
Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I've seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dad, disgusting, fart
There once was a girl named Suzy Brown Said no one could lay her down. Over the hill came Piss Paul Pete, With forty pounds of swinging meat. He took her in the long tall grass, Shoved his dick right up her ass. Then she blew one gnarly fart, Blew his ball two feet apart. Over the hill went Piss Paul Pete, With forty pounds of shredded meat.
Vote: has 52.18 % from 15 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Q: What's the difference between a freezer and a fag? A: A freezer doesn't fart when you pull the meat out.
Vote: has 51.00 % from 53 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart