The best fart jokes

Farting in a lift is wrong on so many levels!
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has 61.99 % from 55 votes. More jokes about: fart
Yo mamas so fat when she farted she caused global warming!
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has 61.56 % from 87 votes. More jokes about: fart, Yo mama
A family brings their elderly mother to a nursing home. The nurses bathe her and set her in a chair at a window. After a while, she slowly starts to lean over sideways in her chair. Two attentive nurses immediately straighten her up. Again, she starts to tilt to the other side. The nurses rush back to put her upright. This goes on all morning. Later, the family arrives and asks, "Are they treating you all right?" "It's pretty nice," the old woman replies. "Except they won't let you fart."
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has 61.43 % from 45 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, family, fart, nurse, old people
I farted in a room of hipsters and I watched them fight each other over who heard it first.
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has 61.01 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: fart, hipster
An Avon Lady was delivering products in a high-rise and was riding in the elevator. Suddenly, she had the powerful urge to fart. Since no one was in the elevator, she let it go - and it was a doozy. Of course, the elevator then stopped at the next floor, so she quickly used some Avon Pine-Scented Spray to cover up the smell. A man entered the elevator and immediately made a face. "Holy cow! What's that smell?" "I don't know, sir. I don't smell anything. What does it smell like to you?" "Like someone crapped a Christmas tree."
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has 60.88 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: business, Christmas, fart, life
A man enters a pet shop. He wants to buy live mice to feed his python. The man saw the cage with a parrot and begins to examine it. In this moment the parrot said, "Your fly is undone." The man blushed. He looked around if anyone sees him and closed his zipper. The parrot said again, "Your pants have a slit back." The man blushed still more and tried to cover his ass with a hand. "Your shoelaces are untied", the parrot does not cease. The man bent down to tie his shoelaces. "Farted! ... You little fart", the parrot yelled. The man died of shame and fled from the store. At this point the mice called from their cage and said, "Coco, thanks you! You saved our lives again. You know, we'll make it up to you."
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has 60.80 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: animal, death, fart, parrot
Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I've seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."
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has 60.15 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: dad, disgusting, fart
Never hold in a fart; that's something an asshole would do.
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has 59.83 % from 43 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Husband: Shall we try a new positon tonight? Wife: Sure. You stand by the ironing board, and I'll sit on the couch while drinking beer and farting.
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has 59.75 % from 37 votes. More jokes about: beer, fart, husband, life, wife
Husband: "Shall we try a different position tonight?" Wife: "That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing board while I sit on the sofa and fart."
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has 59.71 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: communication, fart, marriage, mean, sex
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