The best fart jokes

Q: What did the maxi pad say to the fart? A: You are the wind beneath my wings.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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Once upon a time there were these two bums walking down the railroad tracks, and the first bum, Fred, thought he smelled a nasty old smell. He asked his companion, Jeff, ''Did you s**t your pants?'' "Hell no," Jeff said. They walked a few more miles and the smell got worse. "Did you s**t your pants, Jeff?" "I swear to the God almighty I did not s**t my pants," Jeff said. So they walk three more miles and the smell gets just horrible. Fred runs over and pulls down Jeff's pants and says, "I thought you said you didn't s**t your pants?!" "I didn't." Jeff said. "They're your pants."
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart
Depending on the circumstances, Chuck Norris will decide whether or not his farts will stink. If he chooses to have them stink, he will then also determine the appropriate percentage level of rankness delivered based on the demographics of the attending audience.
Vote: has 50.70 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

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Q. Why don't little girls fart? A. Because they don't get assholes until they're married.
Vote: has 48.08 % from 88 votes. Send joke:

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Why should you only put 239 beans in bean soup? Cuz one more will make it "too farty!"
Vote: has 46.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart, food
If I wanted to hear from an a**hole I would fart.
Vote: has 46.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

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What do you call it when someone farts in a Gay Bar? Mating call
Vote: has 45.33 % from 150 votes. Send joke:

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Chuck norris farted in a ditch and the grand canyon was created.
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

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A guy says, "Doc, you gotta help me. Every time I fart, it sounds like, "Honda." The doctor says, "You say, 'Honda?'" "No," the guy says. "My farts do." So, the doctor says, "OK, open your mouth," and looks inside. After about two minutes, the doctor says, "I'm sorry, I can't help you, you need to go see a dentist." The guy says, "Why a dentist?" The doctor says, "Because you have an absessed tooth." The guy says, "What the hell does that have to do with my condition?" The doctor says, "Well, didn't you know? Absess makes the farts go Honda!"
Vote: has 42.03 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

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Q: How can you tell if a woman is wearing pantyhose? A: Her ankles swell up when she farts.
Vote: has 39.47 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, fart