The best fart jokes

Yo' Mama is so poor, when she farts, her holey underwear whistles.
has 58.75 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: fart, insulting, money, Yo mama
Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"
has 57.83 % from 84 votes. More jokes about: fart, kids, little Johnny, school, teacher
Husband: Shall we try a new positon tonight? Wife: Sure. You stand by the ironing board, and I'll sit on the couch while drinking beer and farting.
has 57.55 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: beer, fart, husband, life, wife
Three kids were smoking behind the shed. "My dad can blow smoke through his nose!" boasted the first. "Ha, mine can blow smoke through this ears!" countered the second boy. "That’s nothing," piped up the third. "My dad can blow smoke through his arse. I know,‘cos I’ve seen the nicotine stains on his undies."
has 57.16 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: dad, fart, kids, weed
Yo' Mama is so nasty, when her dog farts, she takes the credit.
has 56.98 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: dog, fart, insulting, Yo mama
There was an old married couple who love each other very much. But each morning as he was waking up the husband let out a huge nasty wet fart with his wife right in the bed next to him. The wife always says "One day you're going to fart your guts out if you don't stop." Then one day the wife snapped she won't take it anymore and she got up extra early when downstairs and got the guts out of a turkey and put it in the bed behind. She went back downstairs to wait and then she heard the loud disgusting fart all the way down the stairs and then she hears nothing for a long while. Just as she's about to go upstairs and check on her husband he comes stomping down the steps and he says "Honey you were right after I get my guts out but with the grace of God and these two fingers I managed to shove them back up there again."
has 56.84 % from 20 votes. More jokes about: age, disgusting, fart, life, marriage
You are so old, you fart dust.
has 56.77 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: age, fart, insulting
Yo momma so poor I farted in her house and she bowed her head, stomped her feet and praised the lord saying " we got heat".
has 55.34 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: fart, god, money
Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge? A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
has 54.89 % from 48 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, fart, food, gay
Yo mama farts so much there is a reason why Jupiter is made out of gas.
has 54.59 % from 40 votes. More jokes about: chemistry, fart, science, Yo mama
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