The best food jokes

Starbucks is offering a new drink to honor Nancy Pelosi. They call it the "fullacrapuccino".
has 77.50 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: business, customer service, democrat, food, political
A Rolls Royce pulls up in to an expensive restaurant. A sheik emerges, followed by a harem of women and a rooster. After ordering for himself and his harem, the sheik requests a basket of apples for the rooster. The rooster proceeds to eats three baskets of apples. The waiter asks the sheik about the voracious appetite of the rooster. The sheik explains, "A genie granted me three wishes. My first wish was to have an endless supply of money. My second wish was to have many beautiful women. And my third wish was to have an insatiable cock."
has 77.47 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: car, food, life, money, women
Yo mama so old she knew Burger King when he was still a prince.
has 77.46 % from 645 votes. More jokes about: age, food, insulting, Yo mama
An apple, a banana and a penis got into an argument one day. The apple says sadly "I have the worst life ever. People take one bite of me and throw me on the ground." The banana says "You think thats bad? People take off my clothes, eat my insides and leave my clothes on the floor." The penis laughs. "You guys have it easy. You try having people sticking you in dark, wet caves, putting bags over your head, messaging you for hours and making you do push-ups until you throw up!"
has 77.27 % from 442 votes. More jokes about: dirty, food, sex
Spilled milk cries over Chuck Norris.
has 77.03 % from 41 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
We were so poor, we had to go to KFC to lick other people’s fingers.
has 76.99 % from 9 votes. More jokes about: food, money
Your mama so fat she eats ice cream with a shovel.
has 76.86 % from 114 votes. More jokes about: fat, food, Yo mama
Q: What does a kitty like to eat for breakfast? A: Mice Krispies.
has 76.80 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: food, kitty
Two attorneys went into a diner and ordered two drinks. Then they produced sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. The owner became quite concerned and marched over and told them, “You can’t eat your own sandwiches in here!” The attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.
has 76.74 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: food, lawyer
Once there was a bartender who claimed he was the strongest man on earth, he could squeeze every drop of juice out of a lemon and he bet $10,000 that no one could squeeze anymore out of a lemon he has squeezed People came in from all over the country, body builders, weight lifters, wrestlers, or anyone that wanted to try. But no one could squeeze anymore juice out of the lemons. Then one day a little nerdy looking guy walks in and everyone laughs at him when they hear he is there to try to squeeze a lemon. So the bartender squeezes a lemon into a cup an hands him what is left over. Then the guy squeezes out 6 more drops of juice, and everyone is amazed! "What do you do for a living?" they would ask, "Are you a weight lifter, a body builder?" "No", he replied. "I work for the IRS."
has 76.68 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: bartender, food, money, work
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