The best food jokes

What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated on him.
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: food, life, time
Q: Why did the butcher get fired from his job? A: He was caught beating his meat.
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has 67.81 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: food, work
Yo' Mama is so nasty, when I asked what was for dinner, she took off her shoe and said, "Corns."
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has 67.78 % from 36 votes. More jokes about: food, Yo mama
Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat’s milk. The older of the mothers pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. And they start reminiscing. "This is my oldest son Mohammed. He would be 24 years old now." "Yes, I remember him as a baby" says the other mother cheerfully. "He’s a martyr now though" mum confides. "Oh, so sad, dear" says the other. "And this is my second son Kalid. He would be 21." "Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "he had such curly hair when he was born." "He’s a martyr too" says mum quietly. "Oh, gracious me…" says the other. "And this is my third son. My baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would be 18," she whispers. "Yes" says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school." "He’s a martyr also," says mum, with tears in her eyes. After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and says, "They blow up so fast, don’t they?"
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has 67.76 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: age, animal, black humor, food
Two russian guys are walking down the street and they find a $100. So one says, "Ok, lets buy bread for $1 and the rest we spend on vodka?." The other says, "I don't get it, why do we need so much bread?."
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has 67.69 % from 32 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, food, money
Why does a chicken lay eggs? Because if she dropped them, they’d break.
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has 67.64 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
Yo momma so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
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has 67.52 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: fat, food, insulting, Yo mama
An old man and a young man work together in an office. The old man always has a jar of peanuts on his desk, and the young man really loves peanuts. One day, while the old man is away from his desk, the young man yields to temptation and scarfs down over half of the contents of the jar. When the old man returns, the young man feels guilty and confesses to his crime. "Don't worry, son. I never eat the peanuts anyway," the old man replies. "Since I lost my teeth, all I can do is gum chocolate off the M&M's."
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has 67.50 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: age, chocolate, disgusting, food, work
Hey girl, your body reminds me of Mcdonalds, because I'm loving it!
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has 67.47 % from 83 votes. More jokes about: beauty, flirt, food, love
Three guys are stranded on a island; black guy, white guy, and a Mexican. They come across a Indian tribe, the chief said" go into the forest and pick a fruit and bring it back. We are going to shove it up your ass, if you scream we will cut off your head". The white guy goes in and brings back a banana they shove it up his ass he screamed soo they cut off his head. The Mexican goes in and comes back with a grape they shove it up his ass he screams. They all look at his and ask" why you scream?" The Mexican says" because the black guy is coming back with a watermelon.
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has 67.42 % from 259 votes. More jokes about: black people, desert island, food, mexican, racist
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