Chuck Norris eats black holes for breakfast. They taste like chicken.
The secret ingredient in the KFC recipe is Chuck Norris' approval.
Chuck Norris, not Duke, stole the recipie for Bush's Baked Beans.
Q: What day does an Easter egg hate the most? A: Fry-days.
Chicken to turkey: "Only Thanksgiving and Christmas? You're lucky, with us it's any Sunday."
Chuck Norris once ordered a steak in a restaurant. The steak did what it was told.
Chuck Norris is the only one that can turn lemonade into lemons.
Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
Yo' Mama is like a bag of chips: Fri-to-lay.
The phrase "Just a second" comes from the time it takes for Chuck Norris to heat up a cup of coffee... with his breath.