Why wouldn't the reporter leave the mashed potatoes alone? He desperately wanted a scoop.
Yo mama is so stupid when you asked her to grab McDonald's she brings the building home.
Q: What type of bees make milk? A: Boo-bees.
Did you hear about the Easter egg hunt for the Alzheimer's patients? They hid their own eggs!
Yo momma so fat she goes to a resturant, looks at the menu and says "okay!"
Why didn't the mother potato want her daughter to marry the famous newscaster? Because he was a commentator.
A young fellow went to a Jewish Doctor and told the doctor he was worried because he could not get an erection. Whereupon the doctor told him to eat Jewish Rye Bread. So on his way home, the young man stopped a Jewish Bakery and asked for 25 Loaves of Rye Bread. The Baker said "25 Loaves? It will get hard before you get rid of it." Whereupon the patient in excitement said "Give me 50 loaves."
What happened when the cannibal ate the speaking clock? It repeated on him.
Q: Why did the butcher get fired from his job? A: He was caught beating his meat.
A busload of retired Americans was touring Switzerland. On the third day, they visited a farm known for its excellent quality goat cheese. The young farmer's wife gave them a tour, a cheese making a demonstration, and finally some samples. As the retirees were tasting the cheeses, she pointed to a pasture full of goats. She said, "This is a special pasture where we let our older goats graze happily after they can no longer give milk. In the United States, what do you do with your old goats?" An old lady piped up, "Honey, they take us on bus tours."