The best food jokes

Yo mama is so old in her time Burger King was know as Burger Prince.
Vote:
has 65.20 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: age, food, Yo mama
A blonde enters a library. She goes to the counter and says "I'll like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola." The librarian says "Ma'am this is library." So the blonde leans in and whispers "I'd like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola."
Vote:
has 65.19 % from 33 votes. More jokes about: blonde, business, food, stupid
A man visits his doctor with celery stalks stuck in each ear and a carrot stick up each nostril. He mumbles, "Doc, I'm just not feeling well." The doctor replies, "Maybe you're not eating right."
Vote:
has 65.16 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: doctor, food, men
Three guys are alone on a desert island: an engineer, a biologist and an economist. They are starving and don't have a thing to eat, but somehow they find a can of beans on the shore. The engineer says: "Let's hit the can with a rock until it opens." The biologist has another idea: "No. We should wait for a while. Erosion will do the job." Finally, the economist says: "Let's assume that we have a can opener".
Vote:
has 65.08 % from 57 votes. More jokes about: desert island, food, work
I was walking home last night when I noticed an old drunk staggering along the road. He passed a woman who was walking a young child. "Lady", said the drunk, "that's the ugliest kid I've ever seen. Damn, that is one ugly child!." As the drunk wandered off, the lady burst into tears. Just then, a mailman came to her rescue. "What's the matter, madam?" he asked. "I've just been horribly insulted" she sobbed. "There there," said the mailman, reaching into his pocket. "Dry your eyes with this tissue, and here's a banana for the chimp"
Vote:
has 64.93 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, animal, food, kids, ugly
How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: animal, food
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato? Anything, just butter him up.
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food
A French guest, staying in a hotel called room service for some pepper. "Black pepper, or white pepper?" asked the concierge. "Toilette pepper!" came the reply
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food, life
When I offer you food it's just because my mother raised me right. As a firend, read the truth in my eyes and politely decline.
Vote:
has 64.88 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: food, friendship, mean
Did you hear about the guy they found dead with his head in his cornflakes? The police thought it was a cereal killer.
Vote:
has 64.78 % from 14 votes. More jokes about: cop, death, food, life
<<<28293031
More jokes →
Page 28 of 72.