Yo mama so poor she bragged about the time she almost ate at a restaraunt.
First Cannibal: "Have you seen the dentist?"
Second Cannibal: "Yes, he filled my teeth at dinner time."
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Yo Mama's just like peanut-butter...she spreads for bread !
Two eggs were kissing on a bed when the female egg said, "I have to go change. I'll be back in a minute."
Five minutes later, the the female egg walked out in a slinky "egg"lige, rubbing her hands up and down her smooth, oval-shaped body.
Instantly, the male egg slapped his hands on the top of his head, covering it completely.
"What are you doing?," the female egg asked.
He replied, "The last time I was this hard, someone cracked me on the head with a spoon."
How do you describe an angry potato?
Boiling Mad.
What does a British potato say when it thinks something is wonderful?
It's mashing!
Spilled milk cries over Chuck Norris.
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If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.
Q: What did the clock do when it was hungry?
A: It went back four seconds.
My friend thinks that onion is the only fruit that can make us cry.
So I just threw the coconut up to his head, he cried then.
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