Why did the rabbit run out of the fast-food restaurant?
He thought he heard someone order a quarter pounder on a toasted bunny.
Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
Vote:
I took my wife's family out for biscuits and tea.
They weren't very happy about having to donate blood though.
My idea of balanced diet is beer in each hand.
Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.
Q: What is a Democratic Free Market?
A: One that hands out slices of cheese.
Two flies sit on a pile of poop.
One fly passes gas.
The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
Vote:
Yo momma is so fat when she sat on da toilet it said here's a carrot and a diet coke.
A boy asks his mother for breakfast.
She says, "Not until you feed the animals."
The boy goes outside and says to the chicken, "I don't feel like feeding you today."
So he kicks the chicken.
He does the same with the cow and the pig.
The boy goes back into the house and tells his mother that he's hungry.
His mother says, "I saw you kick the chicken, so you're not getting any eggs, I saw you kick the cow, so you're not getting any milk, and I saw kick the pig, so you're not getting any bacon."
Just then the boy's father walks down the steps, trips and kicks the cat.
The boy says, "Mom, should I tell him?"
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she uses bacon as bandages.