The best food jokes

What happened when a cannibal went on a self-catering holiday? He ate himself.
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, food
A waiter walks up to a table of old ladies eating their lunch and asks, "Is anything OK?"
Vote: has 63.75 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: communication, customer service, food, mean, old people
Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with? A: Why, shortbread of course!
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: elf, food
A blonde enters a library. She goes to the counter and says "I'll like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola." The librarian says "Ma'am this is library." So the blonde leans in and whispers "I'd like a cheeseburger, fries, and a cola."
Vote: has 63.66 % from 28 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, business, food, stupid
Question: What’s the ideal breakfast setting? Answer: You’re sitting at the kitchen table and your son is on the cover of the Wheaties box, your mistress is on the cover of Playboy, and your wife is on the back of a milk carton.
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, wife, women
Q: Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? A: Finding half a worm."
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, disgusting, food
Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray this cushy life to keep. I pray for toys that look like mice, And sofa cushions, soft and nice. I pray for gourmet kitty snacks, And someone nice to scratch my back, For windowsills all warm and bright, For shadows to explore at night. I pray I'll always stay real cool And keep the secret feline rule To never tell a human that The world is really ruled by cats!
Vote: has 63.21 % from 57 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: cat, food, kitty, life, poems
What do you get if you cross a steer and a chicken? Roost beef.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
Chuck Norris has his own protien powder. The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
What is a bear's favourite drink? Koka-Koala.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food