The best food jokes

A woman walks into a supermarket and buys: 1 bar of soap 1 toothbrush 1 tube of toothpaste 1 loaf of bread 1 pint of milk 1 single serving of cereal 1 single serving frozen dinner 1 can of Soup For One 1 16oz can of Miller Lite The guy at the checkout looks at her and says, "Single, are you?" The woman smiles sweetly and replies, "How did you guess?" He replies, “Because you’re ugly.”
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, women
Yo mama so poor when i went to her house and picked up a paper plate she yelled "Not my good china!"
Vote: has 60.69 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, insulting, money, Yo mama
A man returns to the U.S. from Africa feeling very ill. He goes to see his doctor, and is immediately rushed to the hospital, to undergo a barrage of extensive tests. The man wakes up after the tests in a private room at the hospital, and the phone by his bed rings. “This is your doctor. We’ve had the results back from your tests and we’ve found you have an extremely nasty virus, which is extremely contagious!” “Oh my gosh,” cries the man. He’s in a panic now. “What are you going to do, doctor?” “Well we’re going to put you on a diet of pizzas, pancakes, and pita bread.” “Will that cure me?” asked the man hopefully. The doctor replied, “Well no, but … it’s the only food we can get under the door.”
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, doctor, food, health, hospital
Yo' Mama is so fat, she uses the refrigerator for her lunch box.
Vote: has 60.56 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, food, insulting, Yo mama
Men are like... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: chocolate, food, men, sex
Chuck Norris does not buy ground beef, he just takes a whole cow, runs it through his beard, and fully cooked hamburgers come out.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Just been to the gym and there's a new machine. Only used it for an hour as I started to feel sick. Its good though, it does everything 'Kitkats, Mars bars, Snickers and crisps'!
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, fitness, food, gym
When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
What do you get from a short-legged cow? Dragon milk.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
What gives milk and has a horn? A milk tank.
Vote: has 60.16 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food