What do spiders like to order at a fast food restaurant? Burgers and flies.
Chuck Norris invented hot sauce. To put on his peppers.
What do you call a take-out low-calorie meal for a cowboy? A Saddle Light Dish.
The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.
Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she uses bacon as bandages.
If kim kardashian was a donut wat kind would she be? Chocolate filled.
Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers. The food cooks itself out of pressure.
A man saw an elderly couple sitting down to lunch at a fast-food restaurant. He noticed that they had ordered just one meal, and as he watched, the older gentleman carefully divided the hamburger in half, then counted out the fries until each had half of them. The old man then began to eat, and his wife sat watching, with her hands folded in her lap. The young man decided to ask if they would let him buy another meal for them so that they didn’t have to split theirs. The old gentleman said, “Oh, no. We’ve been married 50 years, and everything has always been and will always be shared 50-50.” The young man asked the wife if she was going to eat, to which she replied, “Not yet. It’s his turn to use our teeth.”
Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.