The best food jokes

Chuck Norris has his own protien powder. The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food
It's call a Chuck Steak because Chuck just kicked that cow's butt.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
When I offer you food it's just because my mother raised me right. As a firend, read the truth in my eyes and politely decline.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, friendship, mean
Q: What do blondes eat to increase their breast size? A: Silicone chips.
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More jokes about: beauty, blonde, food, stupid
Yo' Mama's cooking is so bad, your family prays after they eat.
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: family, food, religious, Yo mama
A woman walks into a supermarket and buys: 1 bar of soap 1 toothbrush 1 tube of toothpaste 1 loaf of bread 1 pint of milk 1 single serving of cereal 1 single serving frozen dinner 1 can of Soup For One 1 16oz can of Miller Lite The guy at the checkout looks at her and says, "Single, are you?" The woman smiles sweetly and replies, "How did you guess?" He replies, “Because you’re ugly.”
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, women
Do people who run know that we're not food anymore?
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More jokes about: food, sport
Q: How do you know Noah was a White man? A: No nigger could stay on a boat for 40 days without eating the chickens!
Vote: has 60.87 % from 490 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, black people, food, racist, white people
A newlywed couple moves into their new house. One day the husband comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, you know, in the upstairs bathroom one of the pipes is leaking, could you fix it?" The husband says, "What do I look like, Mr. Plumber?" A few days go by, and he comes home from work and his wife says, "Honey, the car won't start. I think it needs a new battery. Could you change it for me?" He says: "What do I look like, Mr. Goodwrench?" Another few days go by, and it's raining pretty hard. The wife finds a leak in the roof. She says, "Honey, there's a leak on the roof! Can you please fix it?" He says, "What do I look like, Bob Vila?" The next day the husband comes home, and the roof is fixed. So is the plumbing. So is the car. He asks his wife what happened. "Oh, I had a handyman come in and fix them," she says. "Great! How much is that going to cost me?" he snarls. Wife says: "Nothing. He said he'd do it for free if I either baked him a cake or slept with him." "Uh, well, what kind of cake did you make?" asks the husband. "What do I look like," she says, "Betty Crocker?"
Vote: has 60.85 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: couple, food, marriage, sex, wife
Where is the best place to hide a nigger's food stamps? Under his work boots.
Vote: has 60.85 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, racist, work