Chuck Norris smells what the Rock is cooking... because the Rock is Chuck Norris' personal chef.
Chuck Norris boils an egg by holding it.
When do cannibals cook you? On Fried-days.
I took my wife's family out for biscuits and tea. They weren't very happy about having to donate blood though.
Q: What is a banana's favorite gymnastic move? A: The splits!
Two flies sit on a pile of poop. One fly passes gas. The other fly looks at him and says, "Hey do you mind? I'm eating here."
What do spiders like to order at a fast food restaurant? Burgers and flies.
Yo' Mama is so skanky, when the waiter brought out her strip steak, she asked where to tuck the dollar bills.
Chuck Norris invented hot sauce. To put on his peppers.
The cake is a lie, Chuck Norris is THE TRUTH.