The best food jokes

Yo' Mama is so fat, she uses the refrigerator for her lunch box.
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: fat, food, insulting, Yo mama
Wheaties is the breakfast of champions, not for Chuck Norris. He eats Chucky Charms, which contains diamonds, sulfuric acid, and radioactive uranium.
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food, science
That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
Vote: has 61.63 % from 23 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, family, food
Q: What do you call an Asian family tree? A: A rice bush.
Vote: has 61.36 % from 60 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: asian, family, food, life, racist
A woman walks into her doctor's office and says, "Doctor, I need to lose weight fast." And the doctor says, "Instead of putting food in your mouth, try putting it up your butt." Two months later she comes in and says, "Doctor, it's a dream come true. I'm half the size I was." But the doctor notices that she is bouncing up and down up and down... and he asks, "But where did you get this twitch?" The woman replies, "I don't have a nervous twitch, I'm chewing bubble gum."
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: disgusting, doctor, food, women
Los Angeles Homeless... Homeless people here are different. You ever notice that? Our homeless people are serious, man. They have signs that not only say, "Will work for food," some of them have what they want: "Baked potato, salad, shrimp, sweet potato pie, sour chives."
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, life, work
Q: What did the Arctic wolf ask in the restaurant? A: "Are these lemmings fresh off the tundra?"
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: dog, food, winter
When I offer you food it's just because my mother raised me right. As a firend, read the truth in my eyes and politely decline.
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, friendship, mean
Once upon a time, my wife and I were in the local restaurant. We have talked to each other, but after a while, I have become quiet and then I started to talk, I have said: "you know, I love you so much, I will never leave you, never, ever, every single day I think only of you, we will be always together." My wife has asked me: "Oh, darling, these words were addressed to me?" I have said only: "Oh, no, sorry, darling, this time I am talking to this bottle of beer."
Vote: has 61.28 % from 16 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: beer, communication, food, love, marriage
Do people who run know that we're not food anymore?
Vote: has 61.25 % from 26 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: food, sport


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