Yo mama is so poor, I went to her place for dinner the other day, and when I asked what we were having, she put her foot up on the table and said "corn !".
Q: What do you get when you cross donkey DNA with an onion? A: A piece of ass that will bring tears to your eyes.
Yo' Mama is so poor, she goes to Kentucky Fried Chicken to lick other people's fingers.
Chuck Norris doesn't take the cake, the cake sees Chuck Norris and begs to be devoured.
What do you get from a short-legged cow? Dragon milk.
What gives milk and has a horn? A milk tank.
How do you know when there's a rabbit in your bed? You can smell the carrots on his breath.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she poured a bowl of Cheerios and said, "Look, my alphabet soup spells 'Ooooo.'"
A man visits his aunt in the nursing home. It turns out that she is taking a nap, so he just sits down in a chair in her room, flips through a few magazines, and munches on some peanuts sitting in a bowl on the table. Eventually, the aunt wakes up, and her nephew realizes he’s absentmindedly finished the entire bowl of peanuts. "I’m so sorry, auntie, I’ve eaten all of your peanuts!" "That’s okay, dearie," the aunt replied. "After I’ve sucked the chocolate off, I don’t care for them anyway."
Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers. The food cooks itself out of pressure.