That moment when you notice that one fork isn't really very clean when you're laying the table and you have to decide which family member you like the least.
Why was the cannibal looking peeky? Because he had just eaten a Chinese dog!
A kid walks up to his teacher and says "When is lunch." The teacher said "When its my break." "Your break for what? the kid asks. "My break up" the teacher said.
Two Muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin turns to the other and says, "Holy Shit it's hot in here!" The other muffin says, "Holy Shit... A talking muffin!"
Q: What kind of bread do elves make sandwiches with? A: Why, shortbread of course!
Why pay $5 at Subway when you can get this footlong for free?
Chuck Norris can have his cake and eat yours too.
What is a bear's favourite drink? Koka-Koala.
Q: Why did the blonde keep an empty carton of milk in the fridge? A: In case she wanted black coffee.
Q: What is a ghosts favorite snack? A: Boo berries