Q: Where do cowboys cook their meals?
A: On the range.
Chuck Norris doesnt eat lunch, he drinks dinner.
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The friend of my mother has taken look at the photo on which I was and has said: "yeah, the stepfather of Johny is a real expert of breeding of meaty pig types."
An American family has grandparents who live in Russia.
Every month, the grandparents send a package of powder to the American family.
The package always says: "Just add water."https://unijokes.com/
Every time the family does this the powder turns into a delicious soup.
The soups are always different and the family is always excited to find out which new foreign flavor they get to try out.
One day, the family receives a package in the mail containing some gray powder.
Assuming that this is another soup, the family dumps it into a pot and adds some water.
However, unlike all the other soups, this one t astes grainy and disgusting.
The family still eats it though just to be polite.
A week later, a letter from the grandpa comes in the mail saying: "Grandma Taya has died and I have sent the ashes to you. She wants to be scattered in America as that is her favorite place."
Men are like......Bananas.
The older they get, the less firm they are
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I bet you don't know what day this is."
"Of course I do," he irritatingly answered, going out the door to the office.
At 11 AM, the doorbell rang, and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a bouquet of red roses.
At 2 PM, a two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived.
Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress.
The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home.
"First the flowers, then the chocolates, and then the dress!" she exclaimed.
"I've never had a more wonderful ‘Independence day' in all my life!"
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple?
A: The Holocaust.
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What is a bear's favourite drink?
Koka-Koala.
Chuck Norris, not Duke, stole the recipie for Bush's Baked Beans.
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Chuck Norris once lost the remote, but maintained control of the TV by yelling at it in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich.
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