Little Johnny: „Mom, can I get a dog at Christmas, please?"
Mother: „No, you'll be getting turkey, like every year!"
A husband and wife are eating soup.
The wife spills soup all over her and says:
"Oh no, I look like a pig"
"Yes and you also have soup all over you!"
My friend's dad went to Hungary.
I asked her, "Was your dad hungry in Hungary?"
What does an annoying pepper do?
It get's jalapeño face
Chuck Norris doesn't eat honey.
He chews bees...
Vote:
What do you call a rabbit who works in a bakery?
A yeaster bunny.
Q: How can you tell that a blonde been baking chocolate chip cookies?
A: There are M&M shells all over the floor.
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.
Vote:
Chuck Norris can eat food while his mouth is closed.
Vote:
Imagine, there are on the bus only 5 persons:
A busman, an old woman, two younger women and one man.
The old woman comes to the busman and tells him: "Dear busman, would you like to eat a few hazelnuts?"
The busman says: "Yes, why not?"
He takes the hazelnuts from her hand and eats them.
This repeats even two times, but when the old woman offers other hazelnuts to the busman for the fourth time, the busman asks this old woman:
"Madame, where do you take all these hazelnuts from? It is a real amount and I am already full."
The old woman only says: "You know, dear busman, I have bought the chocolate with hazelnuts, the hazelnuts are very hard for my dental plate, so I have sucked them all out, brought it to you and you have already eaten them all."