The best food jokes

Two cannibals were having lunch. "Your wife makes a great soup," said one to the other. "Yes!" agreed the first. "But I'm going to miss her terribly."
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: black humor, food, wife
Q: Where do pirates buy their parrot food? A: Petsmarrrrrrrrt!
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has 50.89 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: food, parrot, pirate
Facebook is like a fridge, you keep checking it and nothing has changed.
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has 50.86 % from 179 votes. More jokes about: Facebook, food
For breakfast Chuck Norris enjoys toast and jellyfish.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, fish, food
Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
Champions eat Wheaties for breakfast. Chuck Norris eats Champions for breakfast.
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has 50.70 % from 17 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, food
A blonde walks into a library and asks the librarian, "Can I have a burger and fries?" She replies, "Sorry, this is a library." The blonde whispers, "Oh, sorry. May I have a burger and fries?"
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: blonde, food
The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food, time
Standing in line at a restaurant, I noticed that the few available tables left had not been cleaned off. I mentioned this to the cashier, who told the manager. A minute later, an annoyed-looking teen emerged from the back with a spray bottle and paper towels in hand. "All right," she bellowed clear across the crowded dining room, "which one of you people wanted a clean table?"
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has 50.70 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: food, management, stupid
Over breakfast one morning, a woman said to her husband, "I bet you don't know what day this is." "Of course I do," he irritatingly answered, going out the door to the office. At 11 AM, the doorbell rang, and when the woman opened the door, she was handed a bouquet of red roses. At 2 PM, a two pound box of her favorite chocolates arrived. Later, a boutique delivered a designer dress. The woman couldn't wait for her husband to come home. "First the flowers, then the chocolates, and then the dress!" she exclaimed. "I've never had a more wonderful ‘Independence day' in all my life!"
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has 50.64 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: food, husband, life, marriage, time
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