The best food jokes

Why didn't the cannibal eat Mike Tyson? He thought he would give him a paunch!
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, celebrity, food, sport
What do sick cannibals have for breakfast? Vitamin bills!
Vote: has 44.92 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, food
A farmer was driving along the road with a load of fertilizer. A little boy, playing in front of his house, saw him and called, "What've you got in your truck?" "Fertilizer," the farmer replied. "What are you going to do with it?" asked the little boy. "Put it on strawberries," answered the farmer. "You ought to live here," the little boy advised him. "We put sugar and cream on ours."
Vote: has 44.47 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food
How do you lead a horse to water? With lots of carrots.
Vote: has 44.46 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
Yo' Mama is so fat, she tried to eat her chicken pox.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, fat, food, Yo mama
My husband retired, and for the first time in over 40 years I had to think about preparing midday meals. Tired of it after several months, I said, “I married you for better or worse, but not for lunch.” “Fair enough. From now on I’ll make my own,” he replied. A few weeks later he had to go downtown on business and invited me to join him after wards. “We could have lunch at that Chinese place we both like,” he suggested. I happily agreed. At the restaurant the next day we were seated, and the waiter came to take our order. My husband looked up, a twinkle in his eyes and said, “Separate checks, please…”
Vote: has 43.73 % from 25 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: business, food, husband, old people
A blonde calls her husband at work one day and asks him, "Can you help me when you get home?" "Sure," he replies. "What's the problem?" "Well, I started a really hard puzzle and I can't even find the edge pieces." "Look on the box," he said. "There's always a picture of what the puzzle is." "It's a big rooster," she said. The husband arrives home and tells his blonde wife, "Okay, put the corn flakes back in the box."
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, food, husband, wife
A ham sandwich walked into a bar and the bartender said: "We don't sell to ham sandwiches." But the sandwich replied: "That's okay, I only want a beer."
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bartender, beer, food
What’s a mouse’s favorite record? Please cheese me!
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food, music
Yo Mama's like a fast food retaurant, she takes orders from the front and the back.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, Yo mama