The best food jokes

A blonde walks into a library and says, "Can I have a burger and fries?" The librarian says, "I'm sorry, this is a library." So the blonde whispers, "Oh sorry! can I have a diet coke then?"
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, food
Q. A blonde ordered a pizza and the clerk asked if he should cut it in six or twelve pieces. A. "Six, please. I could never eat twelve pieces."
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, food
Q: What did Bacon say to Tomato? A: Lettuce get together!
Vote: has 31.06 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food
I can teach you how to handle a cucumber.
Vote: has 30.77 % from 29 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food
Q: What did the hard boiled egg say to the boiling water? A: I can't get a hard-on because I was just layed.
Vote: has 30.36 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, food
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't because it won't come.
Vote: has 29.98 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog, food
Why doesnt a man eat out an 80 year old woman? Ever opened up a grilled cheese?
Vote: has 29.92 % from 38 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, disgusting, food
Why do lions always eat raw meat? "Because they don't know how to cook."
Vote: has 29.51 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food
Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate. ' You should give that money to charity,' said the shopkeeper. 'No, I'll buy the chocolate. You give the money to charity!'
Vote: has 29.01 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, money
Two old ladies are in a restaurant. One complains, "You know, the food here is just terrible." The other shakes her head and adds, "And such small portions."
Vote: has 28.48 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: food, old people