The best health jokes

Q: Why was the lesbian sick? A: She was lacking vitamin D.
Vote: has 57.23 % from 59 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, lesbian
Q: What is brown, small, and smells of caramel? A: A diabetic who's been struck by lightning.
Vote: has 56.98 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, health, morbid
Yo momma is so ugly that Superman lost his supervision and went blind.
Vote: has 56.98 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, ugly, Yo mama
Doctor: "What seems to be your trouble?" Patient: "When I get up I feel dizzy for one hour." Doctor: "Try getting up one hour later."
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, health, life
There are bats hanging of a branch upside down, all except one. Two bats comment: "What's happened to this one? I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted.
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, health
Doctor: "I'm sorry but you suffer from a terminal illness and have only 10 to live." Patient: "What do you mean, 10? 10 what? Months? Weeks?!" Doctor: "Nine."
Vote: has 56.86 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, health, life, time
A guy is going down on a prostitute. During the process he pulls out a piece of corn. Mildly disgusted, he tries to forget about it and continues. Then he finds a chunk of carrot and a pea, and he says, "I think I am going to be sick." The whore looks up and says, "That's what the last guy said!"
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, food, health
Chuck Norris once went to Stevie Wonders concerts and smiled at him; Stevie Wonder is now blind.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health, music
Bruce Lee didn't die from an allergic reaction. He died cause Chuck Norris decided to not let him live anymore.
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, death, health, life
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Vote: has 55.11 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, flirt, health, sex