The best health jokes

Two cows were chatting over the fence between their fields. The first cow said, "I tell you, this mad-cow-disease is really pretty scary. They say it is spreading fast; I heard it hit some cows down on the Johnson Farm."  The other cow replied, "Hell, I ain't worried, it won't affect us ducks."
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has 56.65 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: animal, duck, health
My husband, who uses a wheelchair, showed up at his eye doctor for an appointment. The receptionist checked the schedule, then said, "The nurse will call you in a moment. Have a seat." He smiled. "Done."
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has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: communication, health, husband, nurse, stupid
How did the tugboat get AIDS? It was rear-ended by a ferry.
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has 55.11 % from 30 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health
When you break a leg it is actually not your leg that is broken. It´s Chuck Norris´s leg. He owns everything including you and your pityful leg.
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has 54.97 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her crabs ride dune buggies.
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has 54.87 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: health, insulting, Yo mama
What happens when you kiss a canary? You get chirpes, it can't be tweeted because its a canarial disease.
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has 54.66 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, health, parrot
What do you get if you cross a cow with a tension headache? A bad mood.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
There are bats hanging of a branch upside down, all except one. Two bats comment: "What's happened to this one? I don't know, two minutes ago he seemed normal and then he fainted.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
Why did the skunk buy four boxes of tissues? Because he had a stinking cold.
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has 54.59 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, health
One of my friends returned from Afghanistan and I asked him if he is going to the party tomorrow. He said he can't walk.
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has 54.53 % from 92 votes. More jokes about: black humor, health, military, party, war
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