The best health jokes

A guy is going down on a prostitute. During the process he pulls out a piece of corn. Mildly disgusted, he tries to forget about it and continues. Then he finds a chunk of carrot and a pea, and he says, "I think I am going to be sick." The whore looks up and says, "That's what the last guy said!"
Vote: has 56.77 % from 17 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: disgusting, food, health
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
Vote: has 55.11 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, flirt, health, sex
AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 54.97 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
A 92-year old woman had a full cardiac arrest at home and was rushed to the hospital. After about thirty minutes of unsuccessful resuscitation attempts the old lady was pronounced dead. The doctor went to tell the lady's 78-year old daughter (who wasn't blonde any longer, but just had to be at one time) that her mother didn't make it. "Didn't make it? Where could they be? She left in the ambulance forty-five minutes ago!" the former blonde asked.
Vote: has 54.97 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: age, blonde, death, health, hospital
Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
Vote: has 54.87 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, Chuck Norris, health
Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
Vote: has 54.87 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, health
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her crabs ride dune buggies.
Vote: has 54.87 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: health, insulting, Yo mama
What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs? An elephant with diarrhea.
Vote: has 54.59 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, elephant, health
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Halloween, health, kids
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.
Vote: has 54.26 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, health