A guy is going down on a prostitute. During the process he pulls out a piece of corn. Mildly disgusted, he tries to forget about it and continues. Then he finds a chunk of carrot and a pea, and he says, "I think I am going to be sick." The whore looks up and says, "That's what the last guy said!"
Hi, my name is "Milk." I'll do your body good.
AIDS Can't Kill Chuck Norris.
A 92-year old woman had a full cardiac arrest at home and was rushed to the hospital. After about thirty minutes of unsuccessful resuscitation attempts the old lady was pronounced dead. The doctor went to tell the lady's 78-year old daughter (who wasn't blonde any longer, but just had to be at one time) that her mother didn't make it. "Didn't make it? Where could they be? She left in the ambulance forty-five minutes ago!" the former blonde asked.
Chuck Norris is the reason why Professor X is on a wheelchair.
Chuck Norris doesn't need health care, everyone in his viewing range does.
Yo' Mama is so skanky, her crabs ride dune buggies.
What has 2 grey legs and 2 brown legs? An elephant with diarrhea.
A kid once tried to scare Chuck Norris on Halloween... sadly he has had the hiccups now for 40 years.
What do cows get when they are sick? Hay Fever.