Q: What is a Jews biggest dilemma? A: Free Pork.
Hitler: I asked for a glass of juice, not gas the Jews!
Who's the most famous Jewish cook in history? Hitler.
Q: What's the difference between a Catholic wife and a Jewish wife? A: A Catholic wife has real orgasms and fake jewelry.
An old Jewish man gets on the subway in New York and sees a priest. He notices the white collar, and decides to ask what it’s about. "Why do you wear your collar backwards?" The old Jewish man asks. The Priest, being polite, responds, "Well, Sir, because I’m a father." "I am a father too, but I wear my collar normal." "Yes," the Priest begins, "but I am father of many." The old Jewish man shakes his head. "I have 8 children, and so many grandchildren I don’t know most their names, and still my collar isn’t backwards." The priest, aggitated, slams his fist in his palm "Sir! I am the father of hundreds!" The elderly Jewish man, beweildered, stands to get off the subway, and leans over to the priest "Mister, maybe you should start wearing your pants backwards."
The whole idea of Jesus dying to pay for our sins is bullshit. Jews don't pay for anything.
A man in a balaclava with a gun asked, "Are you a Protestant or a Catholic?" "Neither, I'm a Jew." "But are you a Protestant Jew or a Catholic Jew?"
Q: Why do old Jews have outhouses? A: Because their afraid of the showers.
Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race? A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
How to tell who is Jewish in your class, drop a penny and see who gets their first.