The best jewish jokes

Guy gets pulled over in his car by a pair of dudes in balaclavas, pointing guns in his face. Terrorist (menacing voice): "Are you a Catholic or a Protestant?" Driver, panicking, doesn't know which answer will save his life, has a bright idea. Driver: "Neither, actually. In fact I'm Jewish." Terrorist shouts to other terrorist: "Fucking hell Abdul, we've got one at last!"
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has 64.40 % from 163 votes. More jokes about: car, jewish, life, religious, terrorist
Q: Why did Hitler kill himself? A: He saw his gas bill.
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has 62.75 % from 231 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, jewish, money, morbid
One day Kermit the Frog was looking sad. Fozzie Bear went up to him and asked what was wrong. Kermit said, "I'm having problems with Miss Piggy." "Like what?" asked Fozzie. "Well, Piggy wants me to eat her out and I can't." Fozzie asked, "So, what's wrong with that? You're not a prude or anything." "No," sighed Kermit, "but I am a Jew."
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has 59.41 % from 104 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, jewish
Hitler: I asked for a glass of juice, not gas the Jews!
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has 58.86 % from 304 votes. More jokes about: black humor, Hitler, jewish
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
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has 55.96 % from 135 votes. More jokes about: black humor, car, death, jewish, morbid
Q: Why is it good to have a Jewish car? A: It can stop on a dime, and pick it up for you too!
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has 55.12 % from 76 votes. More jokes about: car, jewish, life
Q: What is the difference between Harry Potter and a jew? A: Harry Potter escaped the chamber.
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has 54.38 % from 259 votes. More jokes about: celebrity, death, jewish, morbid
Q: What is the point of Jewish football? A: To get the quarter back
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has 53.31 % from 68 votes. More jokes about: black humor, football, jewish, morbid
A Jewish boy asked his father "Father, can you lend me 50 dollars?" The father replied, "40 dollars, What do you need 30 dollars for?"
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has 52.96 % from 105 votes. More jokes about: communication, jewish, mean, money, racist
Q: How do you get a Jew to win a race? A: Drop a quarter at the finish line.
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has 51.93 % from 98 votes. More jokes about: black humor, jewish