The headmistress at a girls' prep school in the old South (circa 1959) calls down to the army base and speaks with one of the officers: "We're having a social here at school and I was wondering if you could send some of your nice young men to attend." "Why of course," the Lieutenant answers. "Just one thing," says the lady. "Of course you'll make sure there aren't any Jews there." "Why of course," the Lieutenant answers. On the day of the dance, a bus pulls up from the base. Out comes a platoon of black GIs. The schoolmistress is quite distressed. "Why, why, there must be some mistake," she says to a burly black Master Sergeant. "Why heck no, ma'am," he replies. "Lt. Goldberg NEVER makes a mistake!"
Q: Why is it good to have a Jewish car? A: It can stop on a dime, and pick it up for you too!
Q: How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? A: Three in the back, two in the front and the rest in the ashtray.
One day Kermit the Frog was looking sad. Fozzie Bear went up to him and asked what was wrong. Kermit said, "I'm having problems with Miss Piggy." "Like what?" asked Fozzie. "Well, Piggy wants me to eat her out and I can't." Fozzie asked, "So, what's wrong with that? You're not a prude or anything." "No," sighed Kermit, "but I am a Jew."
Q: What is the point of Jewish football? A: To get the quarter back
The real reason Hitler killed himself is because he found out that Chuck Norris is Jewish.
Q: What is the difference between Harry Potter and a jew? A: Harry Potter escaped the chamber.
Q: What do you call a flying Jew? A: Ashes.
Whats the difference between a jew camp and a summer camp? The kids come back.
Q: How many jews can you fit in a VW Beetle? A: 54, two in the front, two in the back, and fifty in the ashtray.