Joke #10016

Where do Russian cows come from? Moscow.

If God didn't want us to eat animals, he wouldn't have made them out of food.

Piranhas in the aquarium: sink your finger, lose your finger-game!

Q: Why does a dog stay in a shadow. A: Because it doesn't want to be a Hotdog.

Q: What does a cooked chicken and a stoner who is afraid of everything have in common? A: They are both baked chickens.

What do cows wear when they are on vacation in Hawaii? Moo moos.

I was just told that my dog chased someone on a bicycle and bit him. That's bullshit, my dog can't even ride a bicycle.

A man came home from the bar with an unknown woman. He woke up in the morning and yelled, "A crocodile, a crocodile!" The woman woke up and asked, "Where, where?" A man cried again, "O-o-oh, the crocodile is talking!"

How do you hire a teddy bear? Put him on stilts.

Yo' Mama is so fat, after sex, she smokes a turkey.

A little girl asks her Mom, "May I take the dog for a walk around the block?" Mom says, "No honey, the dog is in heat." "What's that mean?" asked the child. "Go ask your Father. I think he's in the garage". The little girl goes to the garage and says, "Dad, can I take Susie for a walk around the block? I asked Mom but she said the dog was in heat and said I should ask you". Her Dad said, "Bring Susie over here". He took a rag, soaked it with gasoline, and scrubbed the dog's rear end with it and said, "Ok, you can go now but keep Susie on the leash and only go one time around the block". The little girl leaves and returns a few minutes later with no dog on the leash. Her Dad asks, "Where's Susie?" The girl replies, "Susie ran out of gas about halfway down the block -and there's another dog pushing her home!